31 March 2023

1 Good, 1 Bad House Horrors

 

1 Good, 1 Bad House Horrors

by Kristin Battestella


For every good house horror movie, there are certainly bad house horrors! Here is an exercise in what one haunt does wrong for its women in peril – and what another gets right about feminine horrors.


Skip It!

Treehouse – An infamous chef retreats to his estranged family's vacation home in this 2019 Hulu/Blumhouse Into The Dark entry. Our gourmet is angry at the wannabe chefs on his cooking show, and he can't give his undivided attention to his young daughter – sending her off with an assistant on the weekend of his ex-wife's remarriage. Oversharing dialogue, cars full of chicks, hip music, and creepy convenience store stops pile on the horror cliches alongside unnecessary pop culture platitudes that get old very fast. Every introduction is awkward and each sentence is littered with a tiresome joke or attempted cool reference in this frustrating script. The old family maid at their grand villa says it's the things she can't unsee that keep her up at night, but weird portraits of his father looming over the bedroom, bugs in the kitchen, and bloody gunk in the toilet don't amount to anything. Our chef thinks he is too cool for school, we get it, and helping the ladies next door with flashlights and candles after their generator fails leads to his offering to cook dinner for their bachelorette party. The women, however, are also obnoxious – rude, sassy, diverse yet checking every stereotype amid the self-referential Hulu quips and acoustic ballads by the fire pit. Lilith names, conversations about birth, and Celtic sister tattoos contrast his drunken foot in the mouth flirtations. Unfortunately, statements on women not having a voice and being forced to live with the terrible things that happen to them come off terribly tone deaf before for the sake of it weirdness, peacocks, distorted angles, mirrors, red flashes, and creepy tongues. The overgrown spooky and titular echoes are never used to full advantage despite twig effigies, freaky wooden masks, and a wild mushroom lady knocking at the door. Rather than playing sarcastic and coy, this should have gotten to the horror much sooner, but alas, paralysis and bound to the bed fears leads to bloody lips and ladies in lingerie because our sleazy cook still finds the seemingly evil women “would do” hot. They each re-enacted his past harassments with pentagrams, spells, nail clippings, snakes, and voodoo contortions. Of course, he thinks he can talk his way out of their revenge – taking pot shots with self-esteem insults, insisting a woman's suicide was not his fault, disbelieving his inferior position, and cracking jokes until the crossbows are aimed at his crotch. Escape attempts, aimless twists, family connections, and obvious secrets should be better than this rushed first draft lip service, and it all comes off as girl power turned nasty bully bitches as written by a man. It's such an elaborate set up for what isn't a surprise, and the lesson should have been from the women's point of view. He continues making excuses that there are two sides to every flirtation and he was a drunk teenager so the word “rape” doesn't apply. Instead of provocative commentary, this distasteful, erroneous, hollow, flat perspective misses the point entirely.



Well Done!

The Night House – A drifting boat, swaying wind chimes, as is rooms, and friends offering help left on the doorstep greet widow Rebecca Hall (The Awakening) in this 2020 study on deception and grief. The custom built, isolated lake house reiterates the home alone emptiness, wine, sad songs, chairs for two, and his bare side of the bed before alarm clocks, coffee, and other teachers whispering at school. The dialogue comes naturally – no one would blame her for taking time off, she's not sleeping well, she should get away from the house that her husband built. Beth is frank with a pissy parent, for her husband shot himself in the head so what do grades matter? The radio playing by itself, knocks at the door with no one there, unlocked gates, and muddy footprints create ominous as happy construction videos contrast the loneliness. These home videos aren't found footage for the viewer but Beth watching, crying, and packing away her husband's things. His journals are full of intriguing design configurations, reverse floor plans, symbols, and notes to trick it with puzzles and decoys but not trust it. The character focused horror drama comes in the uncomfortable conversational backstory – teenage Beth was dead for four minutes after car accident and only her husband knew she saw nothing but an empty tunnel. She was the depressing one but now she keeps his nonsensical suicide note in her purse while the sleep paralysis, sleepwalking, nightmares, and ghosts escalate. Rather than repeated scares going round and round for the audience, Beth uncovers evidence of more secrets. Chiming texts apparently from her husband are disturbing enough, but she dials his cell and someone answers. Her agitated, on edge frazzled increases thanks to distorted voices, duplicate images, other women seemingly in the house, and seeing herself sleeping on the sofa. The zigzagging dock stairs lead to bloody boats, red smoke across the lake, caressing winds, and swooning levitation in well done hazy transitions. Flashlight beams reveal women running in the dark, abandoned buildings in the woods, tarps, unfinished construction, and effigies. Bookstore clues and relatable confrontations only lead to more questions as the wronged Mrs. gets carried away in the false floors and gory discoveries. Creaking noises, clutter, and altered house perspectives force us to pay attention and see what may be there. The camera accentuates duality with twofer shots, lookalikes, and similar dreams, and the happy memories disappear once we realize our husband and wife didn't know each other as well as they thought. Friends tell Beth to leave the house, move on with her life and not fall into dark despair, but she mocks the idea before sobbing on the shower floor. The hard bitch solving the mystery attitude drops as the grief finally come forth. Ghostly writings, mirrors, reverse reflections, eerie voices, and distorted visuals accent spooky encounters, visions of past violence, and creepy maze-like attacks. Invisible whooshes and fights with oneself in the last half hour are a little odd. Some metaphors are obvious yet others are unclear and questions on who did what and why remain. However the Final Destination maturity doesn't overstay its welcome. My husband saw this before me, and he says seeing it a second time explains everything. Rather than in your face horror typical; crescendos, editing, and neon lighting punctuate the body contortions, multi level purgatory planes, and dual culmination.


18 March 2023

Unapologetic Foreign Horror

 

Unapologetic Foreign Horror Delights!

by Kristin Battestella


This retro international trio is unashamed of the shocks and gore and unabashedly horror with the saucy and screams.


The Beyond An inherited Louisiana hotel is one of seven gateways to hell in director Lucio Fulci's (The House by the Cemetery) 1981 surreal mix of Lovecratian books and bayou raids. The golden patina and antique interiors of the 1927 opening set off the rattling chains, gory whipping, screams, and squirting blood. “Flesh hisses” captions and swanky crescendos build to the then contemporary shabby and our ingenue heiress weighing the fix up cost versus the hotelier downturns. Call bells ring from empty rooms, hellish paintings abound, and creepy employees are dispensed with thanks to the flooded basement, zombie hands, and eyes popping out of their sockets. Spirits in the window lead to bloody workmen, floating bodies, autopsies, and warnings to leave the hotel. Melting acid and foaming ooze are approaching but the New Orleans jazz clubs remain so smooth as the stylish, unapologetic vignettes take time building unease before the gory payoff, creepy morgue moments, and little girl screams. The chilling scenes may be random or unexplained, but that's indicative of the spreading evil as everything from kooky bookstores and covered furniture to creaking doors, tools, and squeaking gurney wheels becomes on edge eerie. Cemeteries, repeated shots, footsteps, and parallel actions belie viewers with seemingly simple horror before gross bathtubs escalate to real shocks and gore. There's little to understand and not much of a story. No one is actively trying to find out what's happening or resolve the horror, and that is okay! Evil's a'comin' as monsters stalk blind women, dogs attack, and zombie hospital patients rise. Thunder and frightful reactions punctuate perilous falls, man eating spiders, and shootouts before body bags open from the inside and tormented eyes that look upon the horrors turn white. There's something flesh ripping to make anyone's skin crawl here! Dreamlike motion, warped sound, and distorted time mean nothing can be pinned down, and that indeterminate unknown is perhaps the most frightening of all.


The House That Screamed – Multiple versions abound of this 1969 Spanish produced AIP release, and the Tubi edition is cut off the top of the screen so I went with the Elvira's Movie Macabre version for more winks on the 19th century French boarding school murders and innuendo. The carriages, country campus, frilly frocks, swelling music, and period etiquette initially seem so grand, and a new arrival is a shrewd excuse to tour the classrooms. This discrete institution specializes in difficult, illegitimate ladies; and its arts, music, gardening, cooking, and ballet are healthy exercises in the prevention of morbid thoughts. Stern mistress Lilli Palmer (But Not for Me) runs a firm establishment – changing locks and nailing windows shut if need be. Heavy woodwork, cluttered interiors, and uptight fashions are stifling, and even the Foley effect of all the formal, harsh, hefty, old fashioned shoes reflects the strict repression. Unison prayers contrast the rough grabbing, ripping garments, and bound to the bed violence as a confrontational student is stripped and whipped in the seclusion room. Her mean girl perpetrators enjoy the humiliating hierarchy, repressed favoritism, and veiled sexual assault. Our principal's son is also essentially a prisoner kept apart from the poison girls who need correction. He needs a good woman like his mother who holds him tight to her bosom, caresses his hair, and kisses him. Of course, he knows the best crawlspace views and Tuesday is shower day – complete with steaming pipes, clinging white shifts, and scandalous girls who drop their towels just to shock the mistress patrolling the stalls. Although it's tough to keep track of the lookalike girls beyond their stereotypes, the natural, chatty dialogue provides details on who sneaks off from ballet class or who meets with a village boy in the wood shed. Jealousy and needlepoint combine for a montage of tedious threading, moaning voiceovers, rapid editing, and what we don't see saucy. Pretty music, flowers, and slow motion accent a would be romantic rendezvous that leads to warped stabbings and blood in the greenhouse. Thunder, ominous chorales, violent zooms, and freeze frame frights punctuate the spooky late night escape attempts amid fearful realizations and blackmail threats. Atmospheric candelabras and letter openers lead to eerie approaches, slit throats, and screams. It's probably obvious now who the killer is, but the creepy attic revelations are chilling with very little, and it's all still pretty damn twisted!


Hunchback of the Morgue Scenic villas, beer, and tavern wenches suggest good times in this award winning 1972 Paul Naschy (Human Beasts) romp, but cruel insults and gorilla jokes force our eponymous attendant to take the demented slicing and dicing into his own hands. Although church bells and peasant styles invoke a period setting, there are modern cars and road signs, cold hospital white on white, mid century medical equipment, and lesbian inmate patients whipping each other. Mocking doctors and medical students are surprisingly mean and school children stone the pitiful hunched creature – elevating the tragedy and performance before the violent reds and grayish green body parts. Our outcast fights to defend himself, but tenderness is found in a saintly, dying patient, and he can return such kindness, sympathy, and even romance the pretty ladies. His child-like innocence is not ugly, but he realizes his terrible strength is being used to kill thanks to a deceiving doctor who claims he can reanimate the deceased, unrequited love. The surprising caring contrasts the disturbing gore as autopsies become desecration. The mad science, decapitation, and grave robbing make for a fun medieval mix of beauty and blood that forgives the expected low budget foreign dub, subtitles that don't match, and poor print technicalities. Fedora wearing detectives are on to the dismembered cadavers, skeletons, and underground tunnels accented by torches, acid vats, and real rats. Abducted ladies, missing doctors, catacomb chases, and feeding the babes to goo monsters make no apologies as everything is thrown at the screen in a wild, entertaining midnight watch.



09 March 2023

Sudden Oscar Takes! 🏆

 

Sudden Oscar Takes

By Kristin Battestella


My fellow film friends will know that I haven't actively followed the Oscars in ten years and I've written why I'm Disinterested in Awards Season previously. I've only seen one 2023 Oscar nominee – go Turning Red for Best Animated Feature! However, in a recent off camera chat after the Women InSession Podcast at InSessionFilm.com with Amy Thomasson, I had a few knee jerk takes on a few Oscar races. These are of course based on Academy politics rather than film merit...as the wins so often are.


Supporting Actor

Amy loves The Banshees of Inisherin, and I do believe Brendan Gleeson will win. He has the most name recognition out of his fellow category nominees, and a strong man international respect that deserves winning recognition that's been brewing since Braveheart. I don't think Banshees will win anything else though, with the Academy considering Gleeson's overdue acknowledgment enough.


Supporting Actress

Stephanie Hsu was probably only graced with a nomination by The Academy because you can't nominate the beloved Jamie Lee Curtis much less award the supporting white actress in an Asian ensemble film like Everything Everywhere All at Once. Angela Bassett is due and the most likely winner. Remember Oscar has no problem awarding 9 supporting Black women rather than acknowledging more than 1 Black Best Actress winner.


Original Screenplay

Off the cuff I think Tar is most likely to win here. A biopic that's not about a real person, how clever! And there are backstabbing lesbians! It's one step above the “Let's time travel and meet famous people as told by Woody Allen” seen in Midnight in Paris. I don't know that Tar will win more, for Screenplay is where Oscar can have it's soft agreement of the “separate the artist from the accusation” debate.


Best Director

It will be Steven Spielberg if for no other reason than he has the most name recognition of the nominees. Those who wanted him to win for West Side Story last year also probably voted for him this year. The Fabelmens is also semi-autobiographical. Academy bitches love a semi-autobiographical.


International Feature Film

All Quiet on the Western Front will win here because it is also nominated for Best Picture, and I'm sure there are bigoted voters who never want to see a foreign film with Best Picture.


Best Actress

I wouldn't be surprised if Michelle Williams stuns everybody and wins. She is the only nominee who didn't create something perceived as problematic.


For a more nuanced discussion, InSession Film has their Chasing the Gold predictions podcast episode available now. I haven't listened yet! I wonder how similar or different my theories are? I have no idea who deserves to win based on picture or performance because I haven't seen any of the films, which both makes these opinions totally unqualified and yet I fit right in with all the Academy voters who cover their eyes and toss the darts at their ballots!



08 March 2023

It's A Living Season 4

 

Cast Gels for It's A Living Season 4

by Kristin Battestella


The cast is in place for the twenty-five episode 1986-87 syndicated fourth season of It's A Living with “The Roof Show” premiere introducing Sheryl Lee Ralph (Abbott Elementary) as the series' final waitress Ginger St. James. Arguments and secrets over who's trying to get out of work early lead to the ladies being locked out one by one. Unprepared hostess Nancy is left waiting the tables while the waitresses flail at the Above the Top luxury restaurant windows, and the randomness of each set up is a lot of fun because we don't often see the ensemble outside of the hotel where episodes like “The Bar” do best. Orange juice drinking Amy goes along to the singles bar for a rowdy adventure featuring Jonathan Frakes (Star Trek: The Next Generation) and Ernie Hudson (Ghostbusters) in another episode about nothing that showcases the ensemble interplay beyond their job. Three days off is also an excuse for a breakdown on the way to Vegas in the obvious Psycho parody “Night at the Iguana.” Creepy mothers and a motel peppered with taxidermy certainly make the ladies paranoid. They're aware of the Psycho similarities but try not to jump to murderous conclusions in the largely one room humor, and the sharing of fears revelations elevate the goofy spoof. Rumors of workplace dalliances in “The Dot and Howard Show” are also intriguing to see thanks to jealousy, clouded judgments, and rules for no restaurant dating that apply to some but not others. Our ladies are both able to talk it out or tell one it's none of her business – keeping an awkward situation mature. Of course, “Farewell, My Sonny” is clearly the precursor to writer Tom Whedon's “The Case of the Libertine Belle” on The Golden Girls with forties fancy dress, a Bogie-esque detective, and a Who Dunnit Society at Above the Top. The staff is supposed to be in on the murderous ruse, but the crime within a crime provides song and dance winks, and once again I wish It's A Living did more of these one plot, all performance episodes.

Our ladies dream of what they will do when they strike it rich in “Sonny's Oil (aka The Oil Show)”– like buying pantyhose without runs and a bathroom with two sinks. Some, however, remain sensible and get out of the prospecting as more drilling drains more money. More financial plots or get rich quick schemes would have been fitting, but piano player Sonny is erroneously leading here instead of the working waitresses relieved to have life a bit easier with just a little extra money in their pockets. This mid-season seems stronger even if “The Evictables” repeats opposites attract roommates from the First Season  when a landlord dispute has Ginger moving in to a YWCA style, no men allowed building with Amy. A great Patty Duke and The Patty Duke Show joke deserved more time, and you'd think more celebrities would dine at Above the Top! Singing bad summer stock tunes, sleeping in the dressing room lounge, sneaking in the kitchen for breakfast, hiding from Nancy in their lockers – a lot's happening in this episode but the character focus brings it together. The waitresses being left with the child they're babysitting in “Ginger's Baby” has certainly been done already, and the similar Golden Girls episode even originally aired the same week! Nancy changes the schedule and couldn't care less about a baby in the restaurant, but Ginger stands up to her unyielding in a moment that feels written for previous It's A Living star Ann Jillian. Despite the derivatives; the ladies sing, Nancy can't handle the baby, and Howard saws Nancy in half for his magic act. The titular fan club of “The Dickie Doodle Show” has the girls acting out their silly childhood memories, singing while they count their tips, and playing with the props after hours. Such shenanigans interfere with critical vice president meetings and hotel promotion opportunities amid the nostalgic reflection of seeing child stars grow old. The well done farce continues in “A Romantic Comedy” as employee of the month Jan wins a free night at the hotel. The rendezvous, however, is hampered by short staffing, knocks at the door, work emergencies, and injuries as It's A Living uses the entire ensemble to full effect. Young Amy and the new bus boy have potential sparks for “Manhandling,” but she's not ready so he moves in on fellow waitress Dot. Although the meat of the story is off camera, the men between ladies and arguments about who puts out or gets hurt conflicts provide new It's A Living growth.


Unfortunately, the former flames and high school reunions of “The Reunion Show” have already had their share on It's A Living. Everyone reminisces about regrets, mistakes, and bad experiences, but it's all crowded and flat rather than personal. Before we really meet Ginger, Amy accuses her of having an affair with Jan's husband in “Surprise.” It's all innocent misunderstands of course in a half hour that ends up meaningless. Dot's mom and Jan's dad hook up in two scenes for “Family Feud,” as It's A Living wastes more time on repetitive romances. A rival of chef Howard turned restaurant critic arrives in “Critic's Choice,” but the focus here is erroneously on gossip about Ginger and Sonny instead of cuisine jokes and Nancy's fear of a bad review leading to her offering herself to secure the restaurant's reputation. Viewers expect one story but then another plot hogs the time, and the frustrating A/B structure shoehorns everyone in when it's more realistic to not have every waitress work in every episode. The ladies refusing to jump out of a cake despite the $200 pay in “Bachelor Party” could have been its own plot, but Howard's reconciliation with his daughter is also saddled with her dating Sonny. For every potential wisdom, there is another stupid turn. Back to back former boyfriend plots begat “Dot's Priest” and her conflicted feelings over his still being cute and leaving the cloth amid car accidents, Jan's goldfish bowl, and more derivative crowding that doesn't give the characters a chance to shine. The white savior cultural conflict is also played for laughs in “The Howie Show” when Polynesian islanders arrive to worship Howard's magic tricks and offer him a woman to give them a little Howie. The in-uniform Nancy ready to get the most tips and win a best waitress contest should have been the majority of the episode rather than a fun high speed montage in the last 5 minutes. Ginger accepts proposals from two men but both fall through in yet another marriage plot for “The Two Guys Show” while Nancy mixes business with pleasure in Howard's contract negotiations. He demands a clause to cease her physical harassment and sexual innuendos, but she sobs until he forgoes his demands – and then invites him to an adult motel. Such a provocative element deserved to be played seriously, and the excellent performances with devious characterizations strangely shows the best and worst of It's A Living at once. Instead of a singular tour de force, “Nancy's Shrink” is another clip show finale. The psychiatrist thinks her sick sexual fantasies are rooted in her relationships with her coworkers, but the humorous clips jar with the potentially serious therapy. Filler episodes like this show how the writing on It's A Living is not on par with the performances as Nancy brings down the house with a “Love for Sale” song and dance dream.

Barrie Youngfellow's Jan Hoffmeyer Gray remains headstrong, believing in shared marital responsibilities and a woman's right to decide if, where, and when. She fills in as hostess and stands up for when she knows she is right. Jan doesn't get along with her visiting mother-in- law, yet just like last season, her blended family home life goes unexplored. Husband Richard Kline is told of more than seen, with “Richie's Sculpture” being a brief moment about his art on the side when not doing HVAC at Above the Top. Richie wants to take his “Red” to Chicago when a business opportunity arises, but her having to work instead of supporting him is relegated to a C plot resolved in two scenes. When admired for work, home, and going to law school, Jan admits she had to quit school for the time being – an important development relegated to a throwaway line as It's A Living underutilizes its now top billed star. Of course, Marian Mercer's Nancy BeeBee says only Sean Penn could take advantage of her, and she's still after the challenge of obtaining the future “Howard Beebee.” Nancy feigns interest in science to flirt with a potentially rich geologist and sucks up to the crusty hotel management. She wants to become restaurant supervisor of all their West Coast hotels just for the power and is annoyed when she's merely named employee of the month. She would never abuse her position, but she wants to know what Howard would do to keep his boss happy. Nancy hopes the girls pass it on when they call her the meanest boss in town, and she wants to be even meaner when the waitresses stop being afraid of her. She's been deprived of celebration in her life and won't discuss age but drops hints in “Nancy's Birthday Party,” testing her friendship with each girl and bonding over bad birthday memories in superb, humorous soliloquies before some fun mistaken doorbells and cake surprises. It's disappointing we don't get to see her roughing it outdoors when following Howard on his fishing trip, but instead her competitive, wealthy, recently divorced sister Gloria visits in “Nancy's Sister.” Gloria throws herself at Howard in more Golden Girls derivatives, but the repressed, unpopular Nancy won't relent and have it out with her sister. Although Nancy insults their advice, she confides in the ladies, and It's A Living is great when it focuses on a character driven plot that ends with Nancy taking over the piano and singing “My Way.”


Wannabe actress Dot Higgins does a one woman Eleanor Roosevelt workshop, but sadly we don't see Gail Edwards' do more than practice with joke teeth and a bad accent or scream when auditioning for a slasher. Though still often late with outlandish excuses, she stands up to Nancy for docking her $180 when a table leaves without paying. She's excited to pay off her car and today we can certainly understand the extra $176 a month feeling. In “The Dot Quits Show,” Dot doesn't get a role on the A Time for Sorrow soap and wonders if she should be a full time actress or give up show business altogether. Though everything usually stays the same on eighties sitcoms and this episode should have come sooner than the end of the season, it's pleasing to have some growth as Dot admits failure and quits while the remaining three waitresses struggle doing the work of four. Crystal Bernard's chaste Texas transplant Amy Tompkins spells out s-e-x, but she's often reduced to innocent redneck platitudes versus Sonny's predatory cons. She returns from her younger pregnant sister's country wedding in “Amy's Rusty” with twenty-two and single cat lady fears interfering with her work. Her old boyfriend asks her to marry him via postcards and phone calls, but the ladies encourage her to not give in to her family's pressure and marry for the wrong reasons. Amy is said to come out of her shell upon moving in with Sheryl Lee Ralph's sassy Ginger St. James. Again her juicy romances seem to have been written with Ann Jillian's moxie in mind, for Ginger won't date cheapskates and knows how to be suave with the high-tipping customers. She learns a nugget on Nancy and uses it as needed and gives hot advice, but it's not until late in the season that we hear of her obsession with shoes, looking good, and designing her own clothing. Ginger's saving up for fashion school, however rather than see her couture sketches and school application, It's A Living falls back on trite romances. Howard Miller has the zingers to keep Nancy at bay, but Richard Stahl's chef is not above teasing Nancy to get a new oven. He likes that she is always trying to catch him but says that he's trying to keep Nancy's virtue because he's a sucker for lost causes. Episodes that should be about their banter are erroneously shared with weaker plots, and his oft off camera magic tricks could have been fun in the kitchen. Howard's angry when Nancy books a weekend honeymoon suite when they go to a half day conference, but it's just another hear tell twofer that I wish we could have seen!

Paul Kreppel's piano player Sonny Mann asks Howard for dating advice and he suggests thinking of the woman's happiness, but Sonny says he wants to score instead. It's A Living's banter drags to a halt with every sleazy Sonny moment, for he cries violence when women push him away and erases single ladies' reservations from the book so they have to drink at the bar where he can pounce on them. Sonny claims he hears yes when a woman says no, begs for phone numbers, and plays the theme from Vertigo for a fear of heights group dining at Above the Top to overcome their fears. Customers request he stop playing and get lost, and his scams take away from better plots. When Sonny says he can't work because it's Ramadan and is told that it's an Islamic holiday, he answers, “I can pass.” This character grates me so much, I'd skip over his scenes if it were possible. J.D. Lobue and Gary Brown direct the majority of episodes, but the numerous writers again crowd the twenty-two minutes or less runtime with their fellow The Golden Girls similarities. In fact, It's A Living feels like two shows for the price of one thanks to so much borrowing from The Golden Girls – the incidental music, the same guest stars, even a Glenn Miller missing joke, and Dot's pink eighties pad is the up to his neck in hock Miami Vice cop's apartment. Most of the brief apartments here are the same room with different enter or exit doors, and the ladies' changing big hairstyles give away the out of order production. Fortunately, the theme song still bops, and the black uniforms and tone on tone burgundy alternative remain classy amid the heights of the eighties denim, shoulder pads, boots, bright colors, and bows. I realize I take It's A Living too critically at times. The series was content as a safe, serviceable sitcom. However it's also unfair that It's A Living is tough to find with reliance on over the air marathons and DVR. Of the time flaws and the simplicity of yore make for pleasant background viewing, and It's A Living now has its final charming cast in place.


06 March 2023

Is Straight to Series Shopping TV's Death Knell?

 

Is Straight to Series Shopping TV's Death Knell?

By Kristin Battestella


Who doesn't love it when they read the news about a new straight to series or shopped completed television order? Me. 


Unfortunately, like a movie that has a one and the same writer and director with no second eye to spot the flaws and what ifs instead of thats; numerous in the can shows have been chewed up and spit out by viewers and streamers alike with no opportunity to sculpt for maximum appeal and fulfilling storytelling.


There's No Chance to Retool... In the olden days if an unpopular but prominent storyline took up too much screen time, it could be written out as the season progressed. Today, however, a show that's released with all episodes completed as is can't change any problems – leading to viewer hate, tune outs, and cancellations usually after one or two short seasons. Think of all the past shows that were retooled in their debuts and went on to glory such as Star Trek: The Next Generation. Creators often don't have access to streaming numbers or feedback but have to face the social media flak because they can't get rid of what didn't work on their show.


...Or Maximize Characterizations. Recently, I was disappointed in the Netflix series The Innocents because the weaker teen plot should have been reduced in favor of the adult science fiction parables. Sadly, though like so many other lookalike shows were quantity was more important than quality, it was canceled with no chance to fix itself. So a character is getting on the audience's nerves? In Happy Days of yore, Chuck left for college and was never heard of again. How many shows today are saddled with Cousin Oliver kids? Ditching an ill-received character is one way to save a show, but potential breakout characters and more interesting players go underutilized as what could have beens.


Budget Cuts? The cost of a completed show is already an expense paid in full. That cha-ching can get an as is show canned if marketing expectations aren't met or shelved as a write off. With short, rushed 6, 8, or 10 episode series meant to binge all at once, there's no opportunity to make cost cutting measures in media res. No one likes cutbacks, and in some past cases it terribly shows like Highlander: The Series. However, now there's no chance to trim, fine tune, and creatively survive to another reduced season.


Cliffhangers! Wannabe shrewd showrunners think if they end a show with a cliffhanger, they won't get canceled, forgotten, lost in the streaming shuffle, or ditched by their platform. Well, the crowded litter of one season Netlfix Originals proves that wrong. Completed shows have to cross their fingers rather than seeing the declining numbers and the chance to wrap up a season with a decent resolution. Unexpected limited hits scramble for inferior second years. We're at both extremes – network series trudge along with bloated episode orders and streamers prefer cheap, short quantity. Either way, viewers aren't coming back for more.


Disposability over Longevity. In the can shows are treated as content not meant to last, built quick with glossed over flaws as viewers click on the next proffered series. There's no need for continued consistency and storytelling quality when streamers don't want a title to run 3, 5, or 7 years – they want 1 or 2 years of 7 shows that are algorithm alike. Trending for a day, bottom barrel platforms, or never receiving a physical media release does not a water cooler moment make. In the long term, aren't creators hurt by blink and you miss it, disappearing, erroneously ill-received programs? The return to weekly releasing with smaller episode batches allowing in production corrections can be the answer – if the platform is stable or willing to invest in due season.


Creator Opportunity? Certainly I don't wish for the days of studio interference and terrible forced changes. Catering to an audience – or the algorithm – however, is not the answer either. Why aren't we providing time and money to hone satisfactory stories and continued television success? It's important for creators to have a production pause and be able to apply feedback on what isn't working on their show. Serial programs deserve the chance to fine tune their storytelling rather than being sold as packaged commodities of mediocre quality.