More Ghostly Frights!
By Kristin Battestella
Be it continental classic, retro
pastiche, or period made modern, here's a trio of phantasms,
spirits, and hauntings that can be enjoyed any time of year.
The Conjuring 2 – Vera Farmiga and Patrick Wilson return as the
Amityville investigating Ed and Lorraine Warren before crossing the
pond to battle the Enfield Poltergeist in this 2016 sequel. Ouija,
ticking clocks, errant toys, and strange noises in the UK parallel
stateside séances, doppelgangers, violent trances, and out of body
visions. At times however the Amityville shoehorning and “London
Calling” scoring the trip to England feels cliché. The accents are
also odd with Australian Frances O'Connor (Bedazzled) and
Irish Maria Doyle Kennedy (The Tudors) putting on a faux pip
pip cheerio – all these “me bloody brilliant” exclaims are
clearly written by Americans. Fortunately, the 1977 period is felt
via cars, classic ring ring phones, and a shabby house with ugly
walls save for those attention to detail Starsky & Hutch
posters. There's a giant remote clicker, too, and scary TV action
like adjusting the antenna! The first half alternates between the
Enfield scares and talk show hot water Warrens – bonus old reels
and black and white screens let the frightening mood build with
possessing voices and innate sound shocks rather than hollow jump
scares. Not that there aren't recoiling moments, however, thanks to
long camera shots allowing the viewer to creep over the shoulder of
the victim. The younger cast looks genuinely terrified over flying
furniture, phantom bite marks, evil nuns, and freaky paintings.
Naturally, there's potential for fakery, but we're too caught up in
the ghostly Q&A and faith building crosses, carols, and Christmas
trees. Obviously, this is styled more for fear than The Enfield
Haunting, but its interesting
to see two such dramatizations. Both are good for different reasons
despite neither being super accurate. Unfortunately, the practical
effects here look like bad animation, and the Warrens facing their
own demons (hee, pun) leaves mixed signals on what actually needs
vanquishing. Is this about the nun, the old man, or the crooked man?
Plumbing dangers, teleporting, levitating, knives, and lightning
strikes add to the busyness, but tender family moments alleviate the
scares amid the big final confrontation – letting the people rather
than anything crass deliver the horror. And there's Bee Gees music!
It's an out of context “I Started a Joke” but sixties pathos not
disco glory. Yessss!
The Ghost – Skulls,
storms, candles, deathbed cripples and melancholy music to match
immediately set the Gothic mood and Scotland 1910 period stylings of
this colorful 1963 Italian haunt starring Barbara Steele (Black
Sunday). The dubbing is off kilter – the occasional dubbed
Scottish accent is especially bemusing – and the innate video
quality isn't the best. However, syringes, séances, poisons, and
risky medical research mixed with black magic possibilities add to
the up to no good atmosphere and twilight surreal. Illicit meetings,
gin, revolvers, straight razors – the scheming lovers are getting
desperate and antsy waiting for those in the way to die. Steele is
divine in white furs and lace to start before switching to black
mourning veils for the reading of the will. It's tough not to hear
her voice, but some sensuous melodrama accents the suspenseful tone,
tolling bells, howling dogs, and foreboding Psalm 23. Is the missing
key to the safe in the dead and buried's coat pocket? Eerie sounds,
shadows, and wheelchairs moving on their own escalate to ghostly
callings and spooky music box playing while the hysterics, a suspect
housekeeper, and creepy apparitions intensify the macabre treasure
hunt even when there is only one person onscreen. Contemporary
viewers may find the ninety-five minutes slow, and this is rough
around the edges – a derivative scandal and haunting that should
have been tighter. Too many late but wait there's more twists border
on preposterous, yet the increasingly trippy specters do make for a
few surprises. The audience dislikes the phantom, but turnabout upon
the adulterers is fair play with chilling irony, mysticism, double
crossings, crypts, and coffins. We know a set up is coming, but it's
tense good fun in getting there thanks to some ambient captions such
as “Sound of someone knocking,” “Creaking Door,” “Sound of
Footsteps,” and “Clap of Thunder.” Oh yeah.
Witchboard
– A Ouija board and one bad yuppie party leads to the release of a
malevolent spirit in this 1987 scarefest. Granted, it doesn't say
much when Tawny Kitaen (The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of
Yik-Yak) does the best acting here as both her rival male suitors
are lame and full of their own bromance, manpain, and perhaps a whiff
of latent innuendo. There's unintentional comedy, too, with heaps of
eighties fun including wild hair, punk styles, one earring, and
waterbeds. I mean, you don't see rainbow colored mohawks every day!
Old technology such as microfilm, payphones, and cool Cobra cars are
pleasing as well despite a lingering hokey, dated Valley lingo,
laughably bad special effects, and contrived leaps to advance the
plot. Fortunately, eerie hospitals, cemeteries, and foggy dreams add
atmosphere while askew wide lenses and overhead whooshes provide a
poltergeist perspective. Creepy Ouija movements, solo reading
sessions, and freaky séances build suspense alongside pregnancy
twists, zany psychics, and violent ghostly attacks. Who knew just
spelling out with the planchette was so intense! Lovely architecture
and retro styles feel eighties does forties, and there's a reason for
this throwback tone. The spirits also remain mostly unseen – except
when the evil is ax happy that is. Because ghosts can wield axes,
FYI. There is brief nudity and language, but this simple story does a
lot without resorting to bimbo extremes or cheap fouls. Dockside
mishaps and shower perils top of a goofy but fitting finale, and
though of its time, this remains fun and entertaining.
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