Shows
I Didn't Finish – Science Fiction and Fantasy Edition
by
Kristin Battestella
Maybe
these recent short-lived genre shows deserved more of a chance.
Unfortunately, they don't really sell why I should make the time or
the inclination.
The Crossing –
Forty-seven refugees on the Pacific Northwest coast are really
Americans from the future with super powers in this eleven episode
series from 2018. The premise of unexplained arrivals near Seattle
tangling with a government agency is immediately akin to The 4400 amid
cliches such as the new
sheriff with past family issues, cryptic little kids, and officials
on the case pawing over jurisdiction because the script says so. The
bending time process with talk of future evil corporation takeovers
and genetic destiny sound interesting. However, moles, kidnappings, a
future virus carried to the past, and worries about isolation and
outbreak are treated as afterthoughts between car chases, plot of the
week detours, hip music, hot guys, and trailer chic. Poorly paced
writing leaves basic questions hanging in faux serious beats –
false crescendos and needless actions build to a commercial exit with
all the tension in the wrong place. Time wasting visuals linger yet
camera shots are only three or four seconds. It's tough to tell a
story in such fast intercuts or on the move scenes with up to four
plotlines per episode elbowing for room. Drives take long if people
talk on the phone for the ride, but the trip is instantaneous for a
nick of time rescue when over-compensating action is needed.
Confrontations are merely angry phone calls between hollow, arms
length conversations relying on more cellphones, laptops, and
technology. Investigators watch tablet videos of survivors talking –
we don't see the first hand interviews, just watch people watch a
video that happens to be the information the audience needs. People
tell others what to do when they should already know in redundant
dialogue as the point of view bounces between superfluous characters
alongside miscast, ham-fisted acting. Multi-ethnic arrivals telling
of a terrible future and how now is so peaceful with freedom and
rights is totally tone deaf, and the obvious suspicion and xenophobia
underestimate viewers while the biblical references go nowhere. Since
there's no onscreen stamp or indication of how much time has passed,
the DNA tests, barely there doctors, and should have been essential
quarantines seem far too late. The loose flashbacks and voiceover
montages play catch up with car accidents, more arrivals, timeline
changes, and opportunistic assassinations, proceeding more like a
regular thriller than science fiction. These network genre television
shows try to be edgy yet remain perpetually trapped in a weekly
framework – dragging out thin, easily resolved plots over several
episodes while delaying the primary storytelling just to meet the
prerequisite quota. This should have been a taut eight episodes, yet
nine different writers and ten different directors apparently have no
idea what's happening here.
Extant
– Halle Berry (X-Men)
stars in two thirteen episode seasons of this 2013-15 CBS science
fiction mystery from producer Steven Spielberg. After a year long
solo mission, our astronaut has returned to earth pregnant despite
being infertile with her scientist husband Goran Visnjic (ER).
There's
a futuristic trash can cum instant garbage disposal, GIF photo
albums, and outer space effects morph into kid toys – an overused
transition accentuating the immediately try hard mix of near future
family and just for the cool high tech. Touch screen bathroom
mirrors, virtual reality presentations, automated cars, and clear
tablets are imminent enough and make the more fantastic android son,
robots learning the human experience, and science versus the soul
debates feel redundant and windblown. Not to mention all the flashy
future tech will look terribly dated in the next decade. Shadowy
figures in the hedge and people still believing in a lack of
technology get stalled again for our parents in the shower so she can
dream about her previously deceased boyfriend. Friend and doctor
Camryn Manheim (The
Practice) is likewise stuck
with the cliché pregnancy revelations, however the implications of
this unknown violation are frightening thanks to a zero gravity space
station flashback with contaminated samples, interrupted
transmissions, system shut downs, and well done interstellar
graphics. The male voiced computer, older keyboards, switches, and
panels add to the space station perils amid blackouts, faulty
airlocks, help me messages, and visions of the deceased. Recent
suicides and other incidents at her privatized space firm require
psych evaluations and a possible quarantine, but this intriguing
story looses steam when intercut with her husband's radical robotics.
Ominous agencies are awakening men in stasis alongside mysterious
grants and conspiracies – again resorting to stereotypical elements
before the audience has a chance to digest the moral implications
against the possibilities of great science. Secret meetings in the
park and suspicious messages would move the conspiracy forward yet
the editing again goes back and forth between the space station gaps
and the mysteries at home. This entire debut could have been the solo
mission scares before the difficult return home with supposedly not
so dead astronauts knocking on her door whispering about trusting no
one. This series was announced at almost the exact time Gravity
was
released before premiering the following season, and such visual need
to capitalize makes it's tough to enjoy the character dilemmas. The
intercut editing rushes the fantastic drama in forty-two minutes or
less, making it easy to quit early despite an interesting premise and
fine cast.
Legend of the Seeker –
Compared to Game of Thrones
taking
eight years for seventy-three episodes or Merlin
taking
five years for sixty-five shows, today,
two twenty-two episodes seasons is a really big episode order for
this 2008-10 series based on the Terry Goodkind books.
It's surprising this
series lasted that long thanks to an unfamiliar cast playing dress up
and looking modern young amid mystical texts, knights, magical
barriers between realms, powerful stones, and a beefy guy chopping
wood in slow motion just because. The cast plays the who is who or in
charge details, rules of magic, and clunky dialogue totally serious,
making the unnecessary slow motion per every scene laughable yet
lacking in the tongue in cheek humor of its Hercules
and
Xena production
progenitors. Despite epic New Zealand vistas,
horseback chases, confessors, wizards, and ethereal ladies; it's
tough to care because the audience is overwhelmed with constant
exposition dumps, just for cool whisking arrow shots, and slaughter
of the first born flashbacks lifted straight from The
Ten Commandments. He
doesn't know, finds out, doesn't want to know, then uses the good for
vengeance – the sacrificial family tropes, Chosen One destiny
cliches, and basic thousand year old prophecies don't flow
with
any gravitas thanks to the constant rushing. Flash and action
compromise the runes, sword of truth, rustic medieval setting, and
magic mood. Instead of a faithful mini series, this comes off like a
juvenile, rhythm-less
cross between Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter rather than its own
literary mythos, reaching with a trite villain a la Richard Lewis in
Robin Hood: Men in Tights in
the lull before all the gritty fantasy television Thrones
hype.
There's no time for a sense of awe or wonder – we're told there are
oppressed people under a dark lord and now they have hope because of
the seeker, but we never see it. In a time when television was
switching to the shorter, arc storytelling boon we have today,
fifteen different writers in Year One alone tread the episodic
fantasy tires here. Perhaps this grows up as it goes on – there are
certainly enough episodes to get itself together – however, I'm not
going to wait through thirty hours of television for a maybe.
The Musketeers –
Horses, capes, and muskets accent this 2014 BBC adventure alongside
famous French names and the occasional monsieur
or mademoiselle.
The credits, however, are modern roguish rather than 1630
swashbuckler – matching the contemporary cut costumes, sardonic
dialogue, messy hair, and silly mustaches. Despite period buildings
and décor, the dark alley chases, anonymous bar fights, and
surprising lack of color are too bland for the material.
Interchangeable action, tiring slow motion, and over-edited
confrontations made gritty miss the Dumas spirit. Any witty or charm
has no time to banter amid convoluted crimes, espionage fake outs,
and secret corruption almost as if the show is afraid to let a scene
play out and instead prefers cliché manpain, trite revenge, hollow
dangers, and typical plots of the week that happen to have swords.
Intrusive crescendos interrupt the manipulated king, shootouts,
poisons, prison riots, and black widowing when subtly better serves
the off screen screams, hypocritical religion, and ruthless violence.
More interesting conflicted characters take a backseat to duels in
the snow, dungeons, and stolen gunpowder while meandering, run of the
mill preposterous hurts any attempt at something serious – leaving
intrigue, treason talk, or threats to cut off limbs brief and
superficial. The female roles are likewise not characters in their
own right. Be it a whore or a queen and whether it's being caught in
the crossfire, helping the ruse, or kissing one and all; every woman
is used by the men each week. Mature guests such as Jason Flemyng
(X-Men: First Class),
Vincent Regan (300),
Tara Fitzgerald (The Woman in White), and Sean Pertwee
(Dog Soldiers)
would have been fun regulars, and Hugo Speer (The
Full Monty) is
a better musketeer than
all the pretty boys like Santiago Cabrera (Merlin).
Unfortunately,
this desperate to be
cool yarn is not a literary drama like British television is so good
at doing. Pirates and slavery are out of place topics when nothing
seems to be happening in overlong episodes confusing the obvious with
redundant, showy set ups and back and forth double talk on who's
protecting or plotting against the king. How
did this last three
seasons? This series would have been better as stylish special event
movies several times a year like Sharpe where
they could have just, you know, adapted the books rather than sucked
the joy out of the plumes.
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