Thunderball and You Only Live Twice

Skip Thunderball, Enjoy You Only Live Twice

By Kristin Battestella

In this recent Bond escapade I’ve embarked upon, I caught the fourth and fifth installments of the series back to back. Same Bond, same SPECTRE, yet crappy Thunderball and good You Only Live Twice.

In Thunderball, Agent 007 James Bond (Sean Connery) is sent by M (Bernard Lee) to a health spa to recuperate after defeating SPECTRE Number 6 Jacques Bouvar. While there, Bond romances therapist Patricia Fearing (Molly Peters) and stumbles upon the henchmen of Emilio Lago (Adolfo Celi), SPECTRE’s Number 2. Lago, along with the beautiful but deadly Fiona Volpe (Luciana Paluzzi), steals atomic weapons and retreats to his cruise ship the Disco Volante. Fortunately, Bond gets under the skin of Lago’s mistress Domino (Claudine Auger) as he trails Lago from Miami to Bermuda, above the water and below.

I have to admit, I think I zoned out somewhere in the middle of Thunderball. I previously watched the 1983 unofficial remake Never Say Never Again, and in direct comparison, Thunderball looses. Connery’s short shorts may have charmed ladies in the sixties, but goodness gracious they look dumb now. And the orange itsy bitsy diving suit, oiy! As if the underwater sequences weren’t bad enough-you can’t tell who is who in the ill choreographed, dark sequences-the only thing you can see is Connery’s tight little wet orange butt. If that is the only thing I can clearly remember about Thunderball, that’s not a good sign. I can’t believe these were state of the art, award-winning effects in 1965.

Amid the weak script from count ‘em six writers, we do have a fine helping of Bond girls. From therapist Patricia Fearing to vixen Fiona Vulpe, James gets his fair share of loving. It is however bizarre to strengthen women like Vulpe and Bond’s assistant Paula Caplan (Martine Beswick), yet have misused chicks like Domino and Fearing. Even though they all look different and serve Bond at different times, sometimes I had a tough time remembering which gal was whom in Thunderball. And everybody is dang dubbed again!

In addition to confusion with the ladies, there have always been issues behind the scenes for Thunderball as well. Frankly, with such a poor showing here and a less than perfect redo twenty years later, why should I care who has the right to produce this story? I must say, I would love to see this nuclear plot updated to today with a rival Bond against current actor Daniel Craig. I can’t help myself, and the story does have an intriguing premise, an as yet not fully tapped SPECTRE villain Lago, and a chance for another hot Domino. Why not?

Fortunately, I have more love for Connery’s fifth turn as 007 in You Only Live Twice. Instead of anticlimactic water locations, Twice gives us exotic Asia locales and a touch of seriousness for good ole James. After faking his death in Hong Kong, Bond re-emerges in Tokyo to investigate mysterious spacecraft comings and goings over the Sea of Japan. With the help of Japanese Agents Tanaka (Tetsuro Tamba) and Aki (Akiko Wakabayashi), 007 uncovers the true mastermind of the space age American and Russian dissident: Ernest Stavro Blofeld (Donald Pleasence), head of SPECTRE. Bond goes undercover as a Ninja and infiltrates Blofeld’s volcano lair with his pretend Japanese wife Kissy Suzuki (Mie Hama). Will Bond stop Blofeld before American’s next space launch?

A lot of it is very cliché, and I really don’t know why these chicks are always dubbed, but the Japanese feels in You Only Live Twice make the film. Yes, we’ve had stereotypical Asian girls and villains before, but this picture Bond is in Hong Kong and Tokyo. Little of Fleming’s tale is here, but Roald Dahl’s story utilizing fake deaths and undercover ninjas tops any dated faults. I think the Little Nelly helicopter sequences are a little goofy, but unlike Thunderball, what’s dated here seems all in good fun.

After several actors and numerous cloak and dagger tactics, we finally see Blofeld and his white kitty in all their glory. Ala Dr. Evil from Austin Powers, Donald Pleasence is perhaps the best villain ever in You Only Live Twice. He knows what he’s doing and isn’t afraid to be ruthless with Bond or his SPECTRE agents. Villainous front man Mr. Osato (Teru Shimada) also gives Bond an intriguing nemesis, as does corrupt secretary Helga Brandt (Karin Dor). Even if the spaceships and volcano tricks seem silly, there is definitely a sense of peril for Bond, his allies, and the world!

Sometimes it is tough to tell which gal is which, for they sound and look the same-and we never actually hear Kissy Suzuki’s name. Nevertheless, they are beautiful, even if they merely exist to serve Bond again. There is a fine line between being kinky and racist with these easily replaced Asian chicks that Bond beds, but You Only Live Twice embraces its Japanese lovelies and locales more than it abuses them. Karin Dor is also a delight as the ambiguous vixen Helga Brandt. Her scenes with Bond are great, and her fate at the hands of Blofeld is classic.

Though Connery seems to take too long to do everything in Thunderball, he turns serious for You Only Live Twice. There’s plenty of tongue in cheek with all the babes, but Bond really seems like a secret agent here. From the false death to his undercover absorption, Connery totally immerses himself in all of Bond’s skills. He was unhappy with the role and was coaxed back, and in a way, Connery’s displeasure and fear of typecasting helped strengthen and develop Bond into a complex agent with multiple talents to utilize.

You Only Live Twice, I have to admit, is not perfect. The spaceship footage and rocket motifs look like a bad joke today. Some of the ninja montages and volcano finale are also weak; and good Lord Bond receives ‘plastic surgery’ and is made to look Japanese with some fake skin over his eyes! Um, yeah, that would fly today. The last half hour is too long as well, but all in all, You Only Live Twice has a complete hour and a half worth of its complex story. I couldn’t wait for Thunderball to end, but I couldn’t take my eyes away from You Only Live Twice.

I’m sure there are some fans that swear by Thunderball and outlaw You Only Live Twice; it’s the nature of this franchise. The serious plots and strong characters from Twice have however outlived the outfitted Aston Martin and super jet packs from Thunderball. Hard core Connery and lovers of all Bond regardless can love both pictures, but casual viewers should leave Thunderball.

Of course, new, young viewers looking for the latest effects and action won’t find any of the modern fancies in either film. Unfortunately, Thunderball is available on bluray while You Only Live Twice is not. It figures the James Bond Bluray Volume 2 crams Thunderball with For your Eyes Only and From Russia with Love. If only there were a rhyme to these packages beyond financial reasons. For audiences like me who can leave as many Bonds films as I take, picking and choosing isn’t so bad. For collectors, unfortunately, the Bond piggy bank is bleak. All those VHS, then individual DVDs, then the ultimate DVD sets, and now individual and random bluray collections. When will the rape of the 007 consumer end? Begin saving yourself the trouble by skipping Thunderball and enjoying You Only Live Twice.

Live and Let Die

Stereotypes Taint Live and Let Die

By Kristin Battestella

Generally considered at the low end of the James Bond franchise, I like Live and Let Die for its introduction of new Bond Roger Moore and slick performance by Yaphet Kotto. Unfortunately, stereotypical portrayals of Harlem and New Orleans along with a hefty dose of blaxploitation styling make some portions of Live and Let Die too dated and out of touch with the rest of the series.

MI6 Agent 007 (Moore) travels to America to investigate several murders, including the death of a fellow agent. Clues at Mr. Big’s New York Club lead Bond to New Orleans and Caribbean dictator Kanaga (Yaphett Kotto). Along with CIA agent Rosie Carver (Gloria Hendry), Bond travels to San Monique, where boatman Quarrel Jr. (Roy Stewart) helps him rescue the lovely Solitaire (Jane Seymour) from Kanaga’s voodoo practices and drug trafficking.

Some Bond pictures tend to drag or go on too long, but the short length of Live and Let Die is just right. Bond does what he has to do and that’s that. We’ve got the action and the babes, but Moore’s lighthearted tenure begins here with quick pacing and tongue in cheek scenarios. Though Live and Let Die has its faults, Roger Moore isn’t too bad here. Using a magnetic watch to unzip an Italian hottie in his opening scene puts Moore in the cool column. Some of the crocodile sequences and voodoo displays are silly, yes, but these are not his fault. Had Moore been given a tighter, darker script, maybe his sardonic portrayal and less rugged Bond might have developed differently. 

Also charming up the cast for Live and Let Die are Yaphet Kotto (Homicide: Life on the Street) and Jane Seymour (Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman). I like both, so even in the weaker parts of the film, Seymour and Kotto show their talent. Again, some scenes are very silly, from Kotto’s obvious dual role as Kanaga and Mr. Big to Solitaire’s virginal end at the hands of Bond. Solitaire is beautiful and Kanaga is slick, but their dialogue isn’t very strong. Both are merely vehicles for Bond to do his outlandish things. Screenwriter Tom Mankiewicz (Diamonds Are Forever, The Man with the Golden Gun) and director Guy Hamilton (Goldfinger, Diamonds Are Forever, The Man with the Golden Gun) focus more on black stereotypes and seventies motifs of the day rather than giving what could have been an exceptional leading trio something truly meaty. Drugs and tarot cards definitely seem weak after all of SPECTRE’s world domination plans.

Now, some blaxplotation pictures are less derogatory than others and are still pretty good. Unfortunately, Live and Let Die is not one of them. Not only are all the seventies afros and dress very dated, but every black cliché has its moment. Turncoat agent Rosie Carver sports an afro wig and meets her demise after spending the night with WASP Bond. But of course, we don’t see Kanaga bagging Solitaire, do we? I don’t know how accurate the voodoo motifs are, but they don’t look authentic. In fact, all the snakes and skulls rising from the ground are laughable. Even if the opening funeral and jazzy murder are done right, the depictions of Harlem, New Orleans, and the Fillet of Soul restaurants are just too, well, racist. Bond likes some chocolate love on the side while rescuing the white virgin from the big black badass! I don’t know how this could have been acceptable in 1973, and you definitely could not get away with making so blatant a picture today. Even redneck cops make an appearance!

On a better note, who doesn’t love Paul McCartney and Wings’ thunderous Live and Let Die theme? The voodoo title sequence leaves something to be desired, but this is definitely one of the more famous Bond tunes. However, I do wish there was a little less of this gem and a little more of the traditional Bond theme spotlighting throughout the picture. In one scene, a sultry black woman sings Live and Let Die in part of a set up against Bond. It’s not bad, but again it’s a touch of stereotypical blackness that Live and Let Die doesn’t need. After such success with previous Bond vocalist Shirley Bassey, I think this little scene is a slap in the face. Black Bond girls are bad and only good for their jive turkey music for the white boy secret agent! I’m so glad that with kick ass girls like Michelle Yeoh and Halle Berry, this franchise has resolved its early Black and Asian stereotypes. Live and Let Die certainly has its faults, including a weak story and racist overtones. Thankfully, there are some fine action sequences. Even though we traded the loveable Q for bad voodoo, Bond still has great chases-including cool uses of a double decker bus and an extensive boat chase. Bond gets the babes, of course, and the bad guys get their due. In the end, there isn’t much else to ask for in a Bond picture, is there?

Dated and imperfect, Live and Let Die still has a fine cast and solid action. The stereotypical blaxplotation style is not for everyone, but I imagine die-hard Bond fans can dismiss this fault as a sign of the times. Oft aired on television and affordable as an individual DVD, Live and Let Die is available in several collections and bluray sets as well. I really wish the Bond collections were packaged by Bond. The Volume 1 Bluray set hails Dr. No, Live and Let Die, and Die Another Day. Which fans is this set for, and why do they always have a consensus clunker stuck amid the good ones? Collectors no doubt own Live and Let Die, but fans of the cast should also give this one another chance. Some of it is certainly better than the rest, but one can say that about the Bond franchise itself, can’t he?

Suddenly, Last Summer

Superb Cast Owns Suddenly, Last Summer

By Kristin Battestella

Though it was a big controversial film back in 1959, folks today often overlook Suddenly, Last Summer. We know the big names here, from Katherine Hepburn and Elizabeth Taylor to Tennessee Williams and Gore Vidal, so where’s the love? Perhaps dated in its science and social mores onscreen and off, Suddenly Last Summer is still an intelligent, complex character study that deserves another look.

After the death of her high living son Sebastian ‘suddenly, last summer’, Ms. Violet (Hepburn) contacts Dr. John Cukrowicz (Montgomery Clift) in hopes his experimental lobotomy techniques can help her disturbed niece Catherine (Taylor), a witness to Sebastian’s death. Violet promises desperately needed money for Dr. Cukrowicz’s clinic, but after delving into Catherine’s psyche, Dr. Cukrowicz is not so sure brain surgery is the right course of action. What is the true genesis of Catherine’s mental troubles, and why is her aunt Violet so eager for Catherine’s memory to disappear?

Suddenly, Last Summer is intriguing today for its casual talk of lobotomies and brain surgery as new and radical. Taking place in 1937, these technologies were dangerous and misused back in the day. Scary then, that people with enough money can still play with lives and brains as they do here. The effortless toking up and cigarette talk is also strange to see on screen again. These old-fashioned viewpoints and styles like netted hats and gloves add to the black and white noir and suspense. It’s off its time and place, yet says much about us today. We tend to think of the past as so grandiose; but no matter how high and mighty, people are still corrupted by wealth and family secrets. The styles and perceptions may change, but some people don’t.

Made to look ugly even though she clearly isn’t, Elizabeth Taylor’s (A Place In The Sun-also with Clift, Giant, Butterfield 8) Catherine doesn’t appear until over a half hour into the film. Her disturbed, conflicted girl wavers from innocent to sultry to neurotic. Where is the truth? Taylor convinces us, and then turns on the dime. Matching Taylor’s Catherine to Hepburn’s Violet is an intriguing, intelligent game for the audience, and both ladies were nominated for Best Actress here. Even though they don’t meet until the final half hour of the film, Hepburn and Taylor bring this bizarre family’s secrets to a head. What was truly going on last summer? Is Suddenly, Last Summer about Sebastian- his life or his death; or is he merely the catalyst for these women to face their own demons?

Though modern audiences may not care for the one camera, one place, two people stage style; any fan of great film cannot deny the presence of Katharine Hepburn. Her aging eccentric has slick, near sociopath soliloquies, showing she still has her stuff. Hepburn’s (The Philadelphia Story, Woman of the Year, On Golden Pond) varying voice pitch and patterns, mixed with swift statures and fidgets with her shawls and wraps give an extra edge against Montgomery Clift’s quiet demeanor. She’s the elder statesmen of the cast, but Katharine gives Taylor a run for her money. As much as you feel a passing of the torch, Hepburn is sad and likeable while being a true bitch with bite. Violet is not a role just anybody can pull off.

Yes, poor Montgomery Clift (Red River, The Heiress, From Here to Eternity) is caught between these two exceptional women. Looking stronger and healthier than his last appearance with Taylor (he was in a car accident that damaged his face during filming for Raintree Country) Clift is up to the challenge here. He’s charmed by both women, yet keeps his doctor’s wits about him. He genuinely wants to help both ladies and gain the much-needed financial support for his hospital, but ‘Dr. Sugar’ as Violet says, can’t have it all. While quite capable of delivering his own intense scenes, Clift’s dialogue here is more reflexive and responsive to the star ladies. You would think our Dr. Sugar is quietly in control, but against these women, no. Montgomery Clift is perhaps my favorite actor, top 3 most definitely. In his short, tragic career there are quite a few gems and classic essentials. We idolize James Dean and Marlon Brando today, but Clift is often overlooked. One might say he is almost overlooked in Suddenly, Last Summer, but Dr. Sugar is the critical fulcrum on which his powerful co-stars balance. Some actors would crave their fair share, but Clift gives a solid, subdued performance in a decade where everyone seemed to over act.

The supposedly grand and Oscar nominated sets, unfortunately don’t transfer well to the modern screen. Perhaps you could get away with depth tricks and cardboard layers on stage, but not in the film adaptation of Suddenly, Last Summer. The supposedly lofty New Orleans mansions and exotic gardens are too flat, especially in black and white. Thankfully, it’s not the sets one is after. Adapted from his own play, Tennessee Williams (A Streetcar Named Desire, Cat on a Hot Tin Roof) and Gore Vidal (The Left Handed Gun, Caligula) bring dialogue and characters that are much more complex and layered than mere sets could be. Fine acting and simple staples work best: Hepburn always in white and the dark horse Taylor adorned in black-except for Liz’s scandalous, infamous wet and white bathing suit. Sound also plays a special part in Suddenly, Last Summer. Rising music as the women tell their tales, crazy asylum laughter, or lobotomized patients knitting in creaking rocking chairs; at the same time, effects and music know when to be silent for the critical speeches. It’s refreshing to see a film that sticks to old school techniques and lets the cast act-no desensitizing violence, sex, or CGI. Ah, they just don’t make ‘em like they used to.

I will say the end of Suddenly, Last Summer is somewhat overlong. There are too many flashbacks from Taylor, but it’s all necessary to confirm the pieces we’ve received. It’s twisted and bizarre, but worth the wait. Often I hear criticisms that older films are quieter and slow and over done, but for me that’s nicer than a top heavy modern film that ends with half its story to tell because it’s trying to be avante garde. Sure some of Suddenly, Last Summer is obvious to today’s audiences, but the fine performances and getting to the resolution trump any mishandled homosexual innuendo. If you’re a gay man, you’re automatically a pedophile soliciting boys-please! Again, it’s somewhat fascinating to look at these signs of the times. Much of what Williams and Vidal plotted was censored and forced to be redone amid a tense set due to Clift’s own gay leanings and substance abuse. In truth, Hollywood in 1959 was just as disturbed as our onscreen 1937 drama.

With a fine cast at the top of its game and intriguing perspectives on a variety of social subjects from the thirties, fifties, and today- Suddenly, Last Summer is a multi-layered mystery statement that deserves fans to study, dissect, and analyze this picture. Naturally, immature youths and prudes might be put off by the latent homosexual subject matter. Nevertheless, the gay plot elements aren’t what this film is about and one should not be deterred from watching Suddenly, Last Summer because of them. Fans of the cast will of course enjoy; and scholars in film, plays, psychology, or socially might take an educational viewing. Perhaps not easy to find in stores, the DVD is available online at very affordable prices. Take a chance on Suddenly, Last Summer. You might find an old film that makes you think.

Niagara

Niagara Still Steamy and Raging Today

By Kristin Battestella

It had been awhile since I last saw the 1953 Marilyn Monroe vehicle Niagara. On my recent viewing, however, I was pleasantly surprised that the suspense and heat still holds up for today’s audiences.

Finally taking a long overdue honeymoon to Niagara Falls, Ray (Max Showalter) and Polly Cutler (Jean Peters) can’t seem to catch a break once they reach the natural spot for lovers. Also staying at their hotel are George (Joseph Cotton) and his wife Rose (Marilyn Monroe). Although George is rumored to be a mentally ill veteran, Rose bubbles about town and mingles with the younger crowd- much to her older, disturbed husband’s chagrin. When Polly and Ray explore the Falls, Polly sees Rose kissing a man named Patrick (Richard Allan). The two are lovers, and their plan to rid themselves of George and Niagara has been set in motion. Unfortunately, things don’t go to according to plan.

Of course, we can’t talk about Niagara unless we talk about darling Marilyn, her whispy delivery, and her low-cut, tight dresses. Despite being known for her personal life and quintessential sex pot status, Monroe’s (How to Marry A Millionaire, Bus Stop, The Misfits) acting here isn’t too bad. Most actors in the Golden Age of Hollywood overacted, sure, but Marilyn’s brash is no more over the top than costar Joseph Cotton. Her good girl gone criminal Rose is a departure from all those funny singing and dancing sweetie pies, making Niagara one of Monroe’s finer films.  

She’s not meant to be the breakout star of this picture; Monroe’s screen time is actually less than her counterparts, but you can’t take your eyes away from her whenever she’s onscreen. Viewing today, part of that is certainly the legendary hype we’ve built up for Miss Marilyn-I even made my husband watch a moment just to see her in action! Iconic notions aside, Monroe keeps the heat and the suspense going here. After smaller roles in All About Eve and Monkey Business, Niagara brought Monroe to new career heights and cemented her sexy status. Although I have to say that an authorized Playboy appearance and romance with Joe DiMaggio certainly helped.

Now I consider myself an old school film buff, but I’m not much of a Joseph Cotton fan. I’ve seen enough of his pictures, but his oft pairing with another one of my non-favorites Jennifer Jones in Duel in the Sun and Love Letters dampens Cotton for me. Again, he comes from the school of overacting, and his angry and harsh Loomis would be too annoying and obvious if cast today. For Niagara, however, his heavy brooding works. Cotton is older, less pretty than his onscreen wife Monroe, and their opposite styles establish the mystery plot early. It’s strange that we like Marilyn Monroe’s bad girl here because she’s so dynamite, but Cotton is to whom we relate-the everyman just trying to get back on his feet until extreme circumstances force him over the edge.

We observe the Loomises along with Ray and Polly, but unfortunately, Niagara’s secondary couple is a dime a dozen. Max Showalter (The Loretta Young Show) and Jean Peters (Viva Zapata!) have little development on their own. Their delayed honeymoon and intermingling with George and Rose serve for the audience and the plot, but little else. Though both had modestly successful careers, neither can challenge Monroe. But I guess that’s nothing to be ashamed of, is it? Imagine how different Niagara would have been if Anne Baxter had played Polly as originally intended!

One thing in Niagara that does rival our penne ultimate screen goddess is the Falls themselves. I actually visited Niagara Falls for the first time late last year, so it was fascinating to see a constantly changing natural wonder captured on 55-year-old film. Certainly, some blue screen cheats were used, but many noir sequences from director Henry Hathaway (The Shepherd of the Hills, True Grit) are filmed on and about the Falls. In addition to the suspense at hand, I enjoyed the views of Niagara Falls and comparing how they looked then and now. I imagine that 60 years ago you could film on the Canadian side with little interference from tourism. Some of the buildings looked the same, and there weren’t modern riverfront casinos interfering with filming and locales back then. Other scenes featuring Niagara Falls look very different due to the natural rock and water changes that have since occurred. For conservationists that disagree with how the Canadian side of the Falls has been overly developed into an entertainment mecca, Niagara is a bittersweet statement of how these mighty waters once were.

Up against all these onscreen sights and drama, the story by frequent collaborators and Oscar winners Charles Brackett (Sunset Boulevard), Walter Reisch (Gaslight), and Richard Breen (A Foreign Affair) holds well for today’s audience. We may call them ‘thrillers’ instead of ‘film noir’ now, but who doesn’t like some good old fashioned suspense? Maybe to many viewers today, Niagara’s secrets are a bit obvious, but the loveless marriage and murderous plot aren’t the point of the picture. In the highly stylized noirs of old, the getting there is what matters. Yes, we most likely know how things will turn out, but how many twists will Niagara take before it gets there?

As much as I love the lavish Technicolor and red is red lipstick on Marilyn, it is a bit surprising that Niagara is a color feature when most film noir stylings were black and white. Indeed, there’s something spooky and suspenseful about a dark and silver old picture with ambiguous women and murderous waters that would serve the genre. That being said, once you see Niagara, you know why Fox sprang for the color. The natural colors of the Falls and the fashions of Monroe need to be in true blue and hot pink. Thankfully, the onscreen suspense tricks are all there, too. The skillful lighting, foreboding music, and sense of danger before the very dangerous Falls all click for Niagara.

Young fans interested in classic mysteries will enjoy Niagara, and despite having been too steamy for the fifties, the film is safe for family night. Unlike some fellow deserving early Hollywood pictures, Niagara is available on DVD. A new individual set is available, in addition to several Marilyn Monroe collections. Monroe fans and enthusiasts will no doubt upgrade, as I find I have to do with all my classics on VHS. As of yet, it looks likes we’ll have to wait a little longer for the marriage between Marilyn and blu ray. Until then, Niagara is sure to keep young and old on the edge of their seats.

A View To A Kill

A View to A Kill Still A Guilty Pleasure

By Kristin Battestella

Despite my better judgment, I like the 1983 swansong of Roger Moore as British uber spy James Bond in A View To A Kill. Taking nothing but the contrived title from an Ian Fleming short story, A View To A Kill boasts very dated computers, Duran Duran music, a freaky Grace Jones as May Day, and a senior citizen Moore. Oft considered one of the worst Bond outings, for me A View To A Kill is so bad, it’s good.

007 (Moore) tracks computer microchips to Zorin Industries and uses Zorin’s (Christopher Walken) interest in horses to infiltrate the ex KGB agent’s annual horse sale as James St. John Smythe. Bond-now as Stock, James Stock- and oil heiress Stacey Sutton (Tanya Roberts) trail Zorin to San Francisco and uncover his ‘Main Strike’ plan to blow the San Andreas Fault and destroy Silicon Valley. Along the way, Bond wrestles with henchwoman May Day (Grace Jones) and attempts to turn her sway from Zorin.

Well, let’s get the biggest hang up about A View to A Kill out of the way first. By golly, Roger Moore looks old. Old and what we would today call Botoxed. Perhaps in knock down drag outs with the boys, Moore’s elderly Bond might stand a chance. Unfortunately, against the strong and hard-core May Day and the soft and svelte Stacey Sutton, Moore looks too out of touch. When people claim that Moore is ‘sleepwalking’ through his tenure as Bond, this is the film they mean. Bond is almost a non-factor here. Being out witted by a juiced horse and a trick race track-in some ways I feel bad for Moore. Again his villain upstages him.

Best Supporting Actor Winner Christopher Walken (The Deer Hunter) steals A View To A Kill as megalomaniac Zorin. He plays the part to a T, and yet it so eighties clichéd and over the top. His platinum hair is still a delight a quarter of a century later. Zorin’s bizarre relationship with Grace Jones’ (Conan The Destroyer) strongwoman May Day adds to his creepiness, along with his unusual blend of insane genius and gentlemanly style. Unfortunately, Zorin’s use and abuse of May Day doesn’t leave room for the henchwoman to shine. Although her style was a little harsh then and still is now, Jones does make a few scenes play in her favor. Her penchant for death and strength is a little too frightening to be sexy, but it’s certainly memorable.

You can tell I’m an eighties baby since I think Tanya Roberts (The Beastmaster, That 70s Show) is a cool chica. Another Bond girl who doesn’t have much to do and actually doesn’t have a whole lot of screen time, but Roberts’ oil heiress turned geologist Stacey Sutton is one of the few pretty things in A View To A Kill. Her voice is a bit too husky marshmallow to be sprouting tech babble geological talk. But come on, by time we get to Sutton’s analysis of the plight, are you really paying attention to the plot?

Though the snowboarding styled opening sequence is still cool, A View To A Kill is in may ways, not just the end of the Moore era, but the changing of the Bond guard. Lois Maxwell shows her age and retires her role as Miss Moneypenny here. The neon opening credits mixed with the very popular at the time Duran Duran are trying too hard to be hip, and A View To A Kill’s closing tags do not mention which film is coming next. It’s as if veteran director John Glen and screenwriter Richard Mailbaum (late penner of 13 Bond pictures) peaked with a very old and proper Bond in his English riding boots and teeny saddle and little riding hat and didn’t know what to do next.  

Even though the dates of the films rollover, Connery was very much the Sixties ideal, Moore the seventies suave, and Dalton the eighties man in his brief appearances. Already Brosnan’s tenure is dated, and we’ve moved on to Daniel Craig-whose currently hot reboot will fall along the wayside in about fifteen years, too. In 1983, A View To A Kill was quite a violent picture, but the franchise has definitely gotten darker and more brutal since.

Yes it’s a little hokey, dated, and silly, and nearer the bottom of the Bond barrel, but A View To A Kill also exemplifies this long standing franchise. With all its faults, there is something about the innuendo, memorable scenes, and catch phrases that bring viewers back. Knowing how weak this outing is, I can still tune in to A View To A Kill, leave it play in the background, and take pause at the better scenes. Through all its good and bad, changes, and redos, I do believe there is something Bond for everyone.

A View To A Kill looks tame today on the violence and sex front, but its not quite viewing for the entire family. Older action fans can appreciate the early computers and Silicon Valley premise, and no doubt Bond fans already have A View To A Kill in their collections. If you’re a closeted Bond fan, come out with this one for some late night viewing. No one will know, I promise. Look for the DVD or forthcoming bluray if you dare.

Goldfinger

Goldfinger One of the Best Bond Pictures
By Kristin Battestella

Pussy Galore. That naked dead chick painted gold. For casual viewers unfamiliar with the franchise, Goldfinger provides a healthy dose of such quintessential Bond iconography. This 1964 third entry in the James Bond series has babes, gadgets, proper villains, gold heists, and solid action.

As MI6 agent 007 James Bond (Sean Connery) wraps up his Miami vacation, CIA ally Felix Leiter (Cec Linder) brings word from MI6’s head M (Bernard Lee) that Bond is to trail Auric Goldfinger (Gert Frobe), an international gold thief. In Switzerland, Bond joins with Tilly Masterson (Tania Mallet) as she avenges her sister Jill’s (Shirley Eaton) death at the hands of Goldfinger and his Korean henchman Oddjob (Harold Sakata). Bond infiltrates Goldfinger’s base and learns of Operation Grand Slam. Unfortunately, he is captured and flown to Kentucky by Goldfinger’s pilot Pussy Galore (Honor Blackman). Can Bond sway Pussy’s allegiance and foil the plot to blow Fort Knox? 
The pre title sequence in Goldfinger sums up all we need to know about Bond’s world, and Sean Connery has at last settled into his role as 007. He acts like a secret agent, gets the babes, and has the best quips. The way Bond moves in on Goldfinger is completely confident. Connery has the right handle on the fine blend of sex, humor, action-and he fully mixes business with pleasure. Even Bond has to laugh at the over the top nature of his world. The screenplay from longtime Bond writer Richard Maibaum and Paul Dehn (Murder on the Orient Express) gives Bond a level of complexity along with great one liners. We know his weakness for the ladies, and in Goldfinger, it costs him.

Connery’s banter with the always charming Moneypenny (Lois Maxwell) and Q looks so natural. Desmond Llewelyn looks to be having great fun with his decked out Aston Martin creation. Of course, some of the gadgets are highly improbable, but that’s okay. Unfortunately, I do wish we also had a regular Felix Leiter. His rotating actors and all American access is a little deux es machine, but you can’t worry about these things if you intend to enjoy Bond. 

We want Bond to axe the bad guys and bag babes, and one of my favorite things about these pictures is the naughty names for all the leading ladies. Honey Ryder, sure there’s some innuendo, but Pussy Galore? The only thing better then her name is Bond’s reaction: “I must be dreaming.” (I heard a rumor that he was to say ‘I know you are’ but that was too scandalous!) Honor Blackman (The Avengers) boasts all her sixties sex appeal and wit into the role of rough and tough pilot Pussy. Yes in the novel she is a lesbian (magically converted by Bond!), so you do get a sense of butch in her style and mano y mano chats with 007. Nevertheless, Blackman keeps Pussy Galore likeable, cheeky, and equal to Bond physically and sexually. I do wish she had better clothes, but that wouldn’t fit in with her kick ass judo skills. Pussy Galore’s female pilots in her Flying Circus are in the male pilot position just as she is, but they’re played up in sexy flight suits with pointed bosoms and matching blonde hairdos.

I imagine some women’s lib gals might really like Blackman’s banter with Bond or hate it. There is nothing wrong with having a strong action female in a solid action movie, but Goldfinger does fall back on the woman needing the man or switching sides in the end. And of course, we do have our share of kink from Ms. Galore and several other eye candy ladies. Overall, by presenting more than one type of woman beyond the bed for Bond, Goldfinger keeps its edge. It’s dated in its portrayals yes, but the multidimensional women here keep this installment memorable.

Naturally, that takes me to Jill Masterson and her unique death via the golden tan. Although Shirley Eaton (The Saint) doesn’t survive fifteen minutes in the film, the absurdity and the symbolism of death by gold is not lost on today’s audience. It’s sexy, dangerous, completely silly, and yet a frank statement from Ian Fleming about our monetary obsessions. I would have liked more of Tilly Masterson’s brief revenge, but she’s only there to make us hate Goldfinger more rather than fulfill her own vendetta. Thankfully, Goldfinger is such a wonderful villain. We don’t doubt his ruthlessness, but his easy dupes at cards and golf courtesy of Bond make him somewhat goofy. Most Bond villains have some silly hang up, and Goldfinger’s liking gold for its pretty color is no different. Veteran German actor Frobe (Chitty Chitty Bang Bang), however, keeps it fun. He’s chubby and bad ass and an insane genius who’s thought of everything except Bond getting under his skin. Like Goldfinger, another classic character that has been oft parodied is his henchman Oddjob. Death by metal hat, people, be honest. Moreover, aren’t there any early Bond pictures without corrupt and stereotypical Asians? 

Goldfinger has a great instrumental soundtrack from John Barry, and the theme here works well with the traditional Bond tunes. It has its hip sixties brass vibes, but still sounds good today. The vocals by Shirley Bassey, are however, something I could live without. Some of Maurice Binder’s opening title sequences are also better than others, but the overlay here of Bond footage against a golden woman are sexy, classy, and making a statement artistically as well as socially. Well done.

Filmed mostly at Pinewood Studios in England, some of Goldfinger’s Miami facades are a bit hokey. My goodness, all the short shorts, terry cloth, and the bright blue like the ugly sheets on Dark Shadows are ridiculous! I’m also a little tired of all the dubbing done in these early films. Maybe it makes the voices clearer, but it’s amusing when the lips don’t match and all the chicks sound the same. Good thing the Swiss locations are green and lovely, and the car chases are still tight and entertaining. Goldfinger makes its mark with fun gadgets, cool cars, and that great family jewels threatening laser. The gold lame on the women and gold, gold everywhere is a bit overdone, but we’re keeping up with a theme remember. The big finale at Fort Knox has all the intricate, clock ticking action and suspense we need; and I don’t think its any spoiler to say Bond gets his Pussy.

In the twenty films that follow, Bond has certainly had his ups and downs. Goldfinger is the first picture, however, that gets everything right. There’s not a lot of visual naughtiness or gory violence compared to today’s pictures, but the innuendo of Pussy Galore might be too much for younger audiences: “You’re a woman of many parts, Pussy.” Fans of early Bond pictures can watch Goldfinger again and again; and viewers craving solid action and intelligence should give this one another viewing. Look for the affordable DVD or splurge on the bluray release.

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On Her Majesty's Secret Service

What The Heck is On Her Majesty’s Secret Service?

By Kristin Battestella

In this crazy Bond adventure I’ve found myself on, I had to stop and think about On Her Majesty’s Secret Service. I thought I had seen every Bond picture at least once, but honest to goodness I cannot recall ever having seen George Lazenby’s one off 1969 turn as James Bond before my recent viewing. That is not a good sign.

007 James Bond (Lazenby) mingles with crime lord Draco (Gabriele Ferzetti) and his complicated daughter Contessa Tracy di Vicenzo (Diana Rigg) and attempts to find the whereabouts of SPECTRE mastermind Ernst Blofeld (Telly Savalas). When M (Bernard Lee) wants to take Bond off the Blofeld case, Bond turns in his resignation. M accepts, for unbeknownst to Bond, secretary Miss Moneypenny (Lois Maxwell) changed the request to two weeks leave. While romancing Tracy, Bond travels to Switzerland as Sir Hilary Bray and infiltrates Blofeld’s Piz Gloria clinic. Can Bond stop the Angels of Death being brainwashed by Blofeld, save the world, and marry the woman he loves?

Any fan or even layman to the series knows the circumstances around this black sheep of an outing. The once outlawed Never Say Never Again has become more socially accepted as a legitimate Bond picture than the EON sanctioned On Her Majesty’s Secret Service. Right from the opening, Lazenby’s debut is too different from the first five Connery pictures. Here Bond doesn’t really do anything cool in the pre credits sequence; in fact, where most openers have Bond with a Babe, this one loses the girl! Maurice Binder’s title animation is also unique: highlights from the previous films scroll through a martini glass motif-and we have an instrumental theme, too. What gives? Would there have been such drastic differences in look and feel if Sean Connery had reprised his role as producers initially hoped? It’s as if everyone is trying too hard to make On Her Majesty’s Secret Service a Bond picture while at the same time trying to distance it all from Connery’s tenure. Yes, Connery is only one incarnation of Bond, but On Her Majesty’s Secret Service changes too much from what the introductory films have established. Bond leaving MI6, settling down to get married? Lazenby’s in a kilt and Scotsman Connery never was- and there’s no attempt at a Highland rasp, either. Do you need more proof that even the producers love this one less? Well, they went back to Conner for Diamonds Are Forever, didn’t they?

Make no mistake; I have no love lost over Sean Connery. Australian George Lazenby, however, is no Bond. He seems too dorky or not the right build to be a secret agent. No suavity and some very wooden delivery; Sometimes in his hat and glasses, I would forget that this guy was Bond, James Bond. Instead of being a new, younger, more serious character, Lazenby’s Bond looks as if he’s been transported from a 1945 black and white picture to 1969 color and he can’t keep up with it all. Allegedly, he’s dubbed in some scenes, and Lazenby didn’t even get along with director Peter R. Hunt or leading lady Diana Rigg. No wonder he hasn’t done much else before or since.

Thankfully, Diana Rigg (The Avengers) takes her role as Contessa Tracy di Vicenzo far better. She’s charming and cosmopolitan enough for 007, even if she’s a little too English to be an exotic Contessa. The serious romance with Bond is a bit much, but we like Tracy as a counterpart to Bond and feel for her tragic fate. Unfortunately, what is going on with Telly Savalas (Kojak) and his brainwashing Blofeld? ‘You love the chickens…’ what a stupid cover! By time we get to the meat of Rigg and Savalas’ parts, I really just don’t care. It’s also sad that the strides made by this Blofeld and Mrs. Bond are also wiped away for Connery’s return in Diamonds Are Forever. Fans of the franchise, however, can watch On Her Majesty’s Secret Service as part two of the Blofeld show begun in You Only Live Twice. Again, when the villain trumps the Bond, generally, it’s not that good of a Bond picture.

At two and a half hours, On Her Majesty’s Secret Service is too long and seems much longer than it is. The action is weak, even compared to hokey sequences in the previous five films. Skiing away from the begoggled bald Blofeld! Bond staples M, Q, and Moneypenny also don’t have much to do, and surprisingly, there are very little gadgets here. One time director Peter R. Hunt attempts to make a relevant, serious picture for a dissident Vietnam era audience, but eh; On Her Majesty’s Secret Service misses the mark. 

Nevertheless, appreciators of Lazenby’s lone performance and Bond completists will eat up the forthcoming bluray set. Some aficionados swear by On Her Majesty’s Secret Service and that’s fine-there’s a Bond for everyone I suppose. Collectors can certainly find the DVD individually or stuck in the middle of a set. It’s a little annoying to me that the sets don’t go in chronological order or aren’t just packaged per Bond. This forces fans to pay really ridiculous prices for films they aren’t interested in-and it looks like we’ll have to do it all over again with the bluray releases. Ergo, I wouldn’t pay extra for On Her Majesty’s Secret Service if I didn’t have to. Along with Moonraker, I’ve seen On Her Majesty’s Secret Service one time too many.

The Living Daylights

I Like The Living Daylights, So There!

By Kristin Battestella

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Timothy Dalton is my favorite Bond; and it’s a dang pity that I’ve only got two performances of his to review.

 

MI6 agent 007 James Bond (Dalton) helps KGB General Koskov (Jeroen Krabbe) defect after a thwarted shooting attempt by cellist Kara Milovy (Maryam d’Abo). When Koskov disappears again, Bond sneaks Kara out of Bratislava-only to find the shooting was faked. With Kara’s help, Bond tracks down new KGB General Leonid Pushkin (John Rhys-Davies) and American turncoat General Brad Whitaker (Joe Don Baker). Unfortunately, KGB double agents, crooked weapons dealers, and Arab drug lords make allies and enemies blur for Bond.

After a popular but relatively crappy final showing by Roger Moore in A View To A Kill, Timothy Dalton takes the reigns here as a darker, younger, much more energetic Bond. Unlike some of its predecessors, this film is decidedly Dalton’s. Little time is spent on the villains in comparison to Bond’s action. Sure, he doesn’t bag a dozen babes or even have his martinis as usual, but Dalton’s Bond is actually acting like a secret agent most of the time in The Living Daylights. Maybe some fans didn’t like this straightforward action against the tongue in cheek British style of the Connery and Moore eras; nevertheless, Dalton brings multidimensional depths and keeps Bond’s suave style. In previous productions, either the villain stole the show or there was never a doubt that Bond would win the day. In The Living Daylights, Bond’s KGB defections and switcheroos aren’t always so clear-cut. During Dalton’s tenure, there were times when I had to ask myself a Han Solo, ‘How is he going to get out of this one?’

I loved the late Desmond Llyewelyn’s Q, and I’m glad that he remained part of the franchise through nearly every Bond incarnation. His banter with Bond changes from time to time, but his love for his gadgets and his little old Englishman style is great fun. Don’t we all wish we had a Q? Unfortunately, I don’t like Caroline Bliss’ new young and Working Girl-esque Moneypenny. Joe Don Baker (later a CIA good guy Jack Wade in Goldeneye) has his moments in The Living Daylights as military aficionado Whitaker. His obsession with historical campaigns and dictators gives him a unique twist, but it isn’t explored to its full potential. Likewise, John Rhys-Davies (The Lord of The Rings, Indiana Jones) seems to have quite a small quotient of screen time in this two and a half hour yarn.

I like Marym d’Abo’s (Something Is Out There) unconventional Bond lady Kara Milovy. She’s a bit of a naïve artist rather than a femme fatale or a debutant. d’Abo is lovely, there is no doubt, but she’s an unconventional beauty, rather than an accepted goddess like some of the woman before and after. Although her accent gets on my nerves, I like that her hang-ups are both a wrench and an asset to Bond.

Though they are beginning to show some age, the action sequences in The Living Daylights are still fast-paced, exciting, and witty. Though outfitted with the hippest gadgets, Bond’s latest Aston Martin meets an early demise- but the sequence is well worth it. Some may find Kara’s cello toting action an annoying contrivance, but I like it. It’s a little geeky for Bond, no matter how many ways he can MacGyver the instrument. Although I enjoy keeping track of the numerous Bond Girls, there isn’t a lot of that kind of action in The Living Daylights. Some fan boys may not like that. However, the intelligent, cat and mouse, Bond versus the KGB intricacies keep the serious audience in tuned. Intriguing also to see Russian espionage and Afghanistan warfare from the late eighties, politics that are very different from what they were twenty years ago. Is The Living Daylights a thrilling, epic, Oscar worthy masterpiece? No. Can it still hold your attention as a sprawling action yarn? Yes.

 

If you’ve never liked the James Bond franchise because you thought it overblown with dated innuendo and ridiculous scenarios, reconsider with The Living Daylights. Though Dalton’s serious and realistic portrayal would fall out of favor, the series has rebooted with similar grit in blonde Bond Daniel Craig. I don’t understand why the current style is so praised and Dalton’s tenure is so unloved. Strangely, I would say this is one of the more family friendly films in the collection, for there’s hardly any of the tongue in cheek sex and double entrée names we love.

Compared to the violence and gore abound today, The Living Daylights can look like a complex, thrilling, adventure to appreciative younger audiences. Action fans and Bond obsessors alike can still enjoy The Living Daylights. With risk free rental choices, television airings, and on demand or online viewing possibilities, audiences can revisit this worthy Bond flick before taking on the DVD collections or bluray upgrade.