29 September 2017

Top Ten: Old School Vampire Movies!





Welcome to our new Top Tens series in celebration of I Think, Therefore I Review's Tenth Anniversary! These monthly lists will highlight special themes and topics from our extensive archive of reviews.


This time I Think, Therefore I Review presents in reverse chronological order...





Our Top Ten Old School Vampire Movies!






Please see our Foreign Horror tag for even more vamps or our Hammer lists and Women in Horror labels for yet more frightful analysis!



I Think, Therefore I Review began as the blog home for previously published reviews and reprinted critiques by horror author Kristin Battestella. Naturally older articles linked here may be out of date and codes or formatting may be broken. Please excuse any errors and remember our Top Tens will generally only include films, shows, books, or music previously reviewed at I Think, Therefore I Review
 

24 September 2017

Retro Wives and Witches!



Retro Wives and Witches, Oh My!
By Kristin Battestella



These eighties wedded dames and old school widows face ghosts and cult forces when not dabbling in a little something something black magic on the side themselves.



Beyond Evil – A one hundred year old ghostly possession interferes with John Saxon (A Nightmare on Elm Street) and Lynda Day George's (Mission: Impossible) tropical marital bliss in this 1980 tale complete with fine villa interiors, spiral staircases, and that seventies Spanish Gothic mood. The non-English prologue is a little hokey thanks to the cheap production values – the sound is poor and the picture often too dark – and though intense, the fire ceremonies and native rituals end up mostly irrelevant before the jet setting rich white people restart provides the phantom winds, killer accidents, and help too afraid to stay in this surprisingly affordable jungle castle. The shady BFF with suspicious loans, backdoor construction, and intrusive voiceovers also undercuts the Portuguese flashback detailing the past arraigned marriage, black magic, and pacts with the devil. Let the murdered mistresses, poisons, chanting, and creaking doors speak for themselves alongside the blue haze, green smoke, sinister music, nighttime whispers, and zooms in the bedroom. The pace falters when away from the scary, and the tense is better when the no electric, falls, and dangerous pointy statues are allowed to blossom with apparitions at the dinner table, sharp knives, household accidents, and candles that light by themselves. Our husband is not a disbelieving asshole as so often seen in horror – he knows there is something wrong with his sleepless wife and suspects a shady doctor with missing medical files calling the haunting merely mental or womanly over-emotional. However, he doubts the local healer and his hocus pocus as well, and the past horrors merge with the present strain as The Mrs. is violated by the demonic spirit and used to cause fiery vehicle crashes or building accidents. Despite neon eye laser beams and sound effects that stray into a more science fiction look rather than a haunting and crypt explorations that only somewhat explain the killer powers; the fatal kisses, premonitions, bruises, and blackouts create a foreign giallo horror eerie culminating in a fun spectacle and fittingly ghoulish finale.



Macabre – It's murder and passion via New Orleans in this atmospheric 1980 Italian swanky from director Lamberto Bava. The colorful locale is part of the plot with river boats, historic architecture, street corner jazz, and romantic melodies. The lush décor is both tacky seventies with velvet curtains and tawny patinas as well as of old thanks to gilded wallpaper, candelabras, and cluttered antiques. Cigarettes, cocktails, and pearls set off the easy to slip out of satin as illicit phone calls make mom leave the kids to babysit themselves during her dalliance. Moaning and heavy panting overheard by the white knuckled blind neighbor are intercut with child terrors, bathtub horrors, shattered glass, bloody beams, and vehicular shocks before an institution stay and return to the love nest becomes suspicious self love with altars to the deceased, ghostly footsteps, and unseen phantom encounters. Through the banister filming, windows, mirrors, and similar posturing add to the naughty mother and creepy daughter duplicity while our blind virginal musical instrument repair man must listen to the saucy and toot his own horn, so to speak, as the silent awkwardness and martini music provide emotion with little dialogue. The narrative may over-rely on the score, meandering on the pathetic situation too much, but there's enough weirdness balancing the mellow thanks to the cruel temptations and nasty bedroom suggestions as white negligees become black sheers and candlelit interiors darken. The effortless jazz switches to pulsing, scary beats as some serious unexplained ghost sex, undead voodoo, or other unknown witchcraft escalates the decapitation innuendo and like mother, like daughter warped. Our blind audience avatar hides to not be seen, others unseen can sneak passed him, and we're all unable to see behind closed doors – layering the suspense, voyeurism, and two fold bizarre amid bedroom shockers, ominous tokens, overcast cemeteries, and one locked refrigerator. The saucy, nudity, and gore are adult sophisticated without being vulgar in your face tits and splatter a minute like today, and tense toppers don't have to rely on fake out scares. Granted, there are timeline fudges, some confusion, and laughable parts. It's probably obvious what's happening to most viewers, yet we're glued to the screen nonetheless with ironic puns, turnabouts, kitchen frights, and titular twists. I guess edible and sexual horrors don't mix!



Play Dead – Furs and black veils help Lily Munster herself Yvonne De Carlo raise these dated television movie designs along with organ music, classic autos, antiques, and talismans in the casket. Our Aunt Hester stirs up the funeral before sipping her cordial by the fireplace with her rottweiler Greta – who is said to be a rare breed brought special from Europe to match the lanterns, candles, potions, Latin rituals, and animal sacrifices. Kind and never said to harm anybody Greta is sent to dog obedience school before being giving as a gift to Hester's grieving niece and nephew, but their father was Hester's lover before marrying her sister and Greta is really her Murders in the Rue Morgue revenge. However, the slow motion maulings, solo dancing, and shattered mirrors are unnecessary – mere filler slowing the picture down rather than helping create atmosphere. The supposedly tender sex scene is also ridiculously slow, and poor Greta's stuck watching amid the boobs, belt buckles, steamy shower, and ritzy elevator music meets porno melody. Understandably, there's a lot of talking to the dog or oneself, but the dialogue never explains the mystical connections as Greta hitches a ride in the back seat to cause hit and runs or opens bathroom doors to drop the hot curling iron into the tub. The strobe dog scenes are perhaps by animal filming necessity, but the intercut crimes, remote spells, pulsing heartbeats, and pentagram dog tags aren't used to full sinister advantage despite unique strangulations, poisons, and kills that don't immediately incriminate the canine. It's odd then that the crusty cops do suspect the dog because the plot says so – when our no alibi, stands to inherit everything niece has count 'em six people die in her vicinity. Some of the frazzled witness questioning also drags, detracting from De Carlo with some amateur over the top and poor procedurals. Viewers can see why this 1981 release was delayed and this giving the rottweiler a bad name is not for dog lovers, yet this can be laughably bemusing if you accept it for what it is.



Witchcraft – Period torches, hoods, cackling crones, and burning at the stake mobs open this 1988 eerie before a modern birth, a stay with the mother-in-law at her 300 year old Massachusetts mansion, and a woman sitting in the front seat of the station wagon holding the baby in her arms for the trip. That was how we rolled! Indeed, the bad music, shoulder pads, and hectic visuals are Made for TV dated, but the fiery effects are well done amid lightning, windswept nightgowns, rituals in the backyard, animal sacrifices, and suspicious tea. Grandma's taking over the nursery alongside red candles, blood, dark clothing, and old phones contrasting the yuppie fashions and big hair. Cobwebs, dust, covered furniture, and a mute butler add to the foreboding while blurry, distorted camera angles reflect the hazy dreams and drugged stupor. Our husband is giving the cold shoulder and mom's off exploring, but I'd never let that kid out of sight with these mysterious house fires, bloody bandages, and good old fashioned gaslighting about what's happening. The omnipresent movie music springs up just in time for the evil visions, because of course, but the ominous mirrors, boils, and fatal retributions set off the up close cutlery and meaty chewing in one eerie dinner table scene. The bloody flashbacks, dream cop outs, and shock vignettes, however, are disjointed – there are pieces of suspicion and frights, but the plot isn't anything new in the cult wants my baby sub-genre. Despite a lot of quality individual spooky scenes, not a lot actually happens and the audience knows what's going on even if the plot is somewhat eponymous lite before rushing into a heady finale. This is fun for the cheesy midnight movie that it is, but I can't image how there are sixteen of these movies, my word!


22 September 2017

Top Ten: Modern Vampire Movies!





Welcome to our new Top Tens series in celebration of I Think, Therefore I Review's Tenth Anniversary! These monthly lists will highlight special themes and topics from our extensive archive of reviews. 

 

This time I Think, Therefore I Review presents in reverse chronological order...



Our Top Ten Modern Vampire Movies!






Please see our Vampire tag for much, much more or browse our Horror page and Viewing Lists for yet more scary analysis!



I Think, Therefore I Review began as the blog home for previously published reviews and reprinted critiques by horror author Kristin Battestella. Naturally older articles linked here may be out of date and codes or formatting may be broken. Please excuse any errors and remember our Top Tens will generally only include films, shows, books, or music previously reviewed at I Think, Therefore I Review.

17 September 2017

Recent Iffy Lady Thrillers



Recent but Iffy Lady Thrillers
by Kristin Battestella


I'm not seeking bad horror and suspense. I don't really like the so bad it's good perspective either. However, it just seems like recently this genre, be it foreign or domestic, has more than its fair share of big name ladies in peril trapped inside some unimpressive thrillers.



Two Emily Blunt Questionables


The Girl on the Train – Emily Blunt stars in this 2016 adaptation opening with a specific narration on particular addresses, passenger observations, and former neighbors. Our titular lost, lonely drunk has built up a fictitious biography, living vicariously through these strangers, and the voiceover lays the idealized history on thick before changing viewpoints to the objectified fitness guru getting on her naughty and her blonde boss – who also has ties to our original voyeur. These detailed character vignettes and grass is greener parallels make it tough to tell who is the main character while the unnecessary narrations and herky jerky inebriated flashes detract from the hurt reactions, spastic mirrors, and heartbreaking therapy sessions. Testy conversations between ex-husbands or new wives show the intertwined histories and on edge fantasies better, and bitter ladies do some good old fashion social media stalking when not blacking out and waking up with mysterious injuries. Interrogations reveal the commutes to nowhere, but the too brief female detective rightfully calling out the neighborly lookalike coincidences is made a nonentity. Uneven pacing and time jumps going from six months, two years, last week, and more back and forths reset the emotional abuse and spousal possession, deflating the intersecting stories with decoy characters, red herrings, and self inserting Mary Sue meddling. The aimless, drunken film frame disservices the terse conversations and straightforward mystery, leaving hollow affairs and creepy therapist temptations falling back on how you got him is how you lose him trite that's ridiculously easy to solve. The tacked on gaslighting comes with omnipresent evidence breaking the movie's previous viewpoints while our eponymous lady has several opportunities to get herself together but instead intrudes further into the sloppy out of order revelations and disjointed plot holes. Why not go to the scene of the crime to recover your memory sooner or call the police as you race to aide another woman? Why don't the police check on the male boss of a woman after clearing her husband and lover? There are five women in this cast, yet they are all still talking about men, babies, and sex. A potentially interesting discussion on the three stages of women as the has been, the happy wife, and the unhappy lover becomes unfortunately typical in defining a woman by marriage or motherhood: the has been because she can't have kids, the happy wife who has a kid, and the unhappy lover that doesn't want any. One can tell this was written by women but directed by a man, for there should be more to the mother or whore complex – a gal must be a lover in order to be a mother after all, and it shouldn't take being a victim to bring a woman to empowerment. The irony that Blunt was pregnant while playing a barren drinker adds more dimension, for this piece forgets its own clues and under utilizes its potential as a character study on how we think we know the stranger we see every day and how we may actually know the people closest to us the least. This is a very fine ensemble and fans of the cast may enjoy the puzzle, but the taut unravels too much and Mortal Thoughts did it better.


Wind Chill – Before she really came on in the last few years, Blunt did this prerequisite 2007 coeds going home for Christmas horror movie complete with little outerwear despite the frosty Vancouver locales standing in for rural PA and a too cool for school attitude via her super old cell phone and primitive texting. There are actual bulletin boards, nerdy classmates, and a crappy old front wheel drive sedan amid the bad accents, conceited philosophies, painted toe nails, and complaints about wearing glasses. Retro holiday tunes and clock countdowns create better highway monotony as idle chit chat reveals personal information and skeptical directions. The older protagonists do have some realistic conversations, arguments, and accusations – there's no need for time wasting music montages thanks to scenic detours, spin outs, snowy roads, and luring suspicions. What's romantic surprise to one is stalkerish orchestration to another, but a nor'easter's bringing thirty degrees below numbers and our hungry pair is trapped in their shoddy car overnight with nearby cemeteries and apparitions in the storm. Bodies in the snowdrift, abandoned monasteries, and bizarre police twists have all kinds of ghostly victims stopping by this overpass! Unfortunately, the fake outs, flashbacks, need to pee, and conserving body heat winks get typical alongside “I'll be right back” resets and false rescue hopes. The don't know why this is Rated R gore is laughable rather than scary, and the melodramatic conversations over a conveniently found newspaper giving the fifties history take too many leaps for the suspension of disbelief. Not naming the characters likewise hampers personality and character development – its not could be anybody relatable disaster bonding when the generic horror players can't even call each other by name. The natural dilemma and individual suspicions are dropped long before they decide to use the telephone pole box, and this confusion over being supernatural horror or natural thriller lacks a much needed zing. Cliche what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger growth goes on too long, and it all ends up too convenient when nobody bothered to try getting the car out of the snowbank in the first place.



And Two Star Vehicles to Skip


Shut In – Widowed Maine psychologist Naomi Watts (The Ring) is trapped in a storm while being haunted by little Jacob Tremblay (Room) in this 2016 international but already problematic PG-13 paint-by-numbers crammed with the isolated blonde, ghosts, kids horrors, weather perils, and one spooky basement. Accidents and home movies on the cell phone also laden the start before the lakeside locales, snowy blankets, and paraplegic burdens. The grief and inability to care for an invalid teen is understandable, and our step-mom considers sending him to a facility. However, the frazzled woman increasingly replacing her sick son with a younger therapy patient and the creepy temptations on holding the invalid under the bath water become hollow thanks to the obligatory it was just a dream jump cuts. Unnecessary technology and time wasting glances at watches and clocks are also intrusive – the camera focuses on dialing 911 with the finger poised over the send button and intercutting person to person like a traditional phone call flows much better than up close Skype screens. Weatherman warnings and news reports as the research montage lead to flashlights outside, icy footprints, and car alarms, but again the tension falls back on textbook raccoon scares with round and round scenes outside in the snow or inside on the phone doing little. Maybe one doesn't think straight in the panic, but most of those frosty searches include shouting for a deaf mute boy who can't hear you nor answer back. The psychology is also common fluff, i.e. teens have difficulty with divorce, you don't say – Skyping Oliver Platt (Chicago Med) provides better therapy, so we know what's going to happen to his character! Besides, all the shadows in the hallway, hidden wall panels, unexplained scratches, locked doors opening by themselves, and ghostly little hands in the bedroom yet the women still end up talking about a man. Fading in and out transitions mirror the sleeping pills and drinking, but such shifts break the world immersion before the storm even hits. When the doctor says her bloodwork indicates she's being drugged, mom doesn't even care – because the twist is for the audience not the main character. Lanterns, black out attacks, and video evidence right before the power failure could be good, but random people arrive despite blocked roads and the oedipal sociopath jealously provides a dumb chase finale as the stalker conveniently sing songs “Hush Little Baby” so we know where he is when he's coming for you. Good thing that foreboding blizzard talked about the entire movie stops in time for the lakeside happy ending that apparently has no legal, medical, or parental consequences.



The Tall Man – The northwestern blue collar and downtrodden mining town rustic set the scene for disappearing children and eponymous tales in this 2012 international co-production. Cool looking credits and an obligatory driving montage interrupt the opening thirty-six hours before flashback, sputtering the story with no point of view anchoring the disjointedness. Are we following widowed nurse Jessica Biel (A Kind of Murder) or deflecting with the shady townsfolk and family secrets? Not to mention the unnecessary, cryptic voiceover waxing on some dangerous evil and terrifying legend tells rather than shows – and it's the inner monologue of a willfully mute emo teen writing down what she wants to say in a journal. Well filmed household attacks and road perils add scrapes and bruises thanks to shadowed abductors, rusty vans, and killer dogs while abandoned factory buildings, creepy infrastructure, and hidden tunnels add atmosphere. A cobwebbed chapel, fire and brimstone sermons on the radio, and spooky wooded altars seem to be going somewhere with cult or supernatural aspects, but unfortunately, they remain mere red herrings. The You Go Girl action is also convenient to free bonds, track footprints, knockout attackers, or accidentally find the bad guy's hideout. Spying on officials and town mobs lead to reverse pursuits, and the 180 degree plot twists change the movie into something entirely different to what it says on the tin. More flashbacks and narrations give explanations that don't make much sense, and the perspective should have been one side of the story or the other – not an attempting to be clever deception between the two. For that switcharoo, I'd rather follow crusty sheriff William B. Davis (The X-Files) and desperate FBI agent Stephen McHattie (Orphan Black) investigating this supposed serial killer instead of some warped elitist white woman turned self proclaimed savior giving barren ladies a bad name. Whatever message being sent here is unclear thanks to this “good” child trafficking organization spin, and the finale tacks on another voiceover questioning whether kidnapping poor children and covertly placing them in rich homes is good or bad. o_O



08 September 2017

Top Ten: Charlton Heston!






Welcome to our new Top Tens series in celebration of I Think, Therefore I Review's Tenth Anniversary! These monthly lists will highlight special themes and topics from our extensive archive of reviews.



This time I Think, Therefore I Review presents in chronological order...



Our Top Ten Charlton Heston!






Please see our Classics tag for more or our Charlton Heston label for yet more old school analysis!




I Think, Therefore I Review began as the blog home for previously published reviews and reprinted critiques by horror author Kristin Battestella. Naturally older articles linked here may be out of date and codes or formatting may be broken. Please excuse any errors and remember our Top Tens will generally only include films, shows, books, or music previously reviewed at I Think, Therefore I Review

 

29 August 2017

Top Ten: Tom Hiddleston!





Welcome to our new Top Tens series in celebration of I Think, Therefore I Review's Tenth Anniversary! These monthly lists will highlight special themes and topics from our extensive archive of reviews.


This time I Think, Therefore I Review presents in ranked order...





Our Top Ten Tom Hiddleston Shows!

7. Thor




Please see our Tom Hiddleston tag for yet more pictures or our Shakespeare label for further theatrical analysis! 
 


I Think, Therefore I Review began as the blog home for previously published reviews and reprinted critiques by horror author Kristin Battestella. Naturally older articles linked here may be out of date and codes or formatting may be broken. Please excuse any errors and remember our Top Tens will generally only include films, shows, books, or music previously reviewed at I Think, Therefore I Review

 

27 August 2017

The Night Manager



The Night Manager Brings Cinematic Espionage to the Small Screen
by Kristin Battestella



The Nefertiti Hotel's night manager Jonathan Pine (Tom Hiddleston) receives documents implementing arms dealer Richard Roper (Hugh Laurie) and is later recruited by International Enforcement Chief Angela Burr (Olivia Colman) in Switzerland to infiltrate Roper's criminal organization. Pine builds his rap sheet in Devon as Jack Linden before becoming the injured Thomas Quince welcomed into Roper's island fortress in Mallorca. There, Pine becomes Andrew Birch – the front man in Roper's latest shell company buying and selling chemical weapons. Unfortunately, bureaucratic red tape, dalliances with Roper's girlfriend Jed (Elizabeth Debicki), and suspicious right hand man Corky (Tom Hollander) put the operation at risk as Pine is cut off from his handler and falls deeper into this lavish but deadly enterprise.

BBC and AMC's 2016 co-production of John Le Carre's The Night Manager is an impressive six hour adaptation brimming with sophisticated espionage and cinematic flair thanks to Emmy winning director Susanne Bier (In a Better World) and screenwriting nominee David Farr's (MI-5) update on the 1993 novel's Caribbean cartels turned contemporary Mediterranean arms. The Night Manager begins with the 2011 Egyptian Revolution, intercutting the hotbed protests in the street with video clips of our corrupt entrepreneur. The luxury hotel isn't much safer with complimentary cocktails, seductive clientele, and confidential documents, but early conversations layer what the audience needs to know – naming the bad boys, our titular employee's history, and redacted weapons manifests. There's a buttoned up formality in the nighttime bustle accented by unique through the water fountain camera angles, and zooming in on the eyes brings us closer but not within the eponymous inner workings as breathy lips near the phone receiver escalate the room service flirtation. This desert subtlety is well framed as silhouetted men walk through door frames or archways, entering deeper as critical information goes to the wrong source. Interfering with weapons deals, swapping rooms, and having a little hideaway romance leads to bruised faces and consequences while bureaucratic paper work prevents the outdated government agency with no lift or heat from pursuing its quarry. Warning phone calls come too late, and fatalities linger into the chilly present with mysterious packages and testy confrontations as our hotelier must make his choice. Unfortunately, the island luxury, continental travel, and sailing to fancy dinner parties turns into family terror. Although this second hour's opening hostage exotic is somewhat Bondian, there's relationship drama, female character developments, and depth to the ruses with disturbing give a sip of wine to the young boy and see if he likes it then give the kid a rifle and watch what happens jokes. Indoctrinating speeches and spy placements take The Night Manager back six months, and as the eponymous blank slate steps into the out of focus field office, the camera angle and his new identity become clear. This agency needs the perfect psychopath performance, and rules don't apply to the good guys if they need to get the bad guys. Infiltrating the Devon underground with motorcycles, slapping around pimps, bad drug deals, bar fights, and bloody crime scenes trump up a legend as broken bones take the put on violence too far – leaving our asset injured with the enemy seeing to his care. MI-6 and the CIA go back and forth on if they are playing ball or stonewalling each other, and each hour of The Night Manager builds its own well paced narrative with the overarching mission details and the play within a play questions on who's off the undercover script, cut off, or in too deep, thus intertwining the at home drama amid the slight of hand espionage.


Family consequences and fatal fractures come for the middle man by Episode Three, for there's a price to pay in being friendly with the worst man in the world. Business dealings are done at children's parties with the magic tricks, and tennis, beach side runs, and infinity pools come along with hefty threats – you are not a prisoner so long as one abides the house rules and doesn't tug on the leash. The bodyguards come along when going out for ice cream, and kids are used in making covert handler contact as veiled conversations say one thing and mean another amid house alarms, stolen phones, secret rooms, and keys hidden in the peppermints. Information passed outside goes back inside, creating a wedge at this Tudor-eqsue court with whispers on the balcony, deals disguised as entertainment, and strolls planting the seeds of doubt. Revelations lie behind every closed door, scorned women know too much, couples are tested, and new dalliances made – thinking about the ladies keeps a man up at night but the transparent politicians offer a different bribe in this multi-level game played with bedroom intimacy and continental meetings. The snooping gets damn risky as code names, client lists revealed, new signatures, and company facades bring our insider to the forefront. Truths said to be told in anger and spread as manure are believed by one where others are dismissed as a smear campaign when they are just as true. The circumvention almost seems too easy, but sweet selling speeches on how to win by keeping the losers guessing are said directly to the camera. Anonymous partners don't know what they are buying and selling and don't care so they can sleep at night, but paper trail leaks and revealing nighttime encounters upset this perilous balance. Kisses create complications, officials are strong armed with roadside perils, and details on the big money operation are given to the audience with envelope drops and innocuous park bench chats. Our hotelier's smoothing over panache comes in handy for the illegal trade alongside decoy cargo ships, tapped phone lines, and exposed eyes only materials. Who's double crossing whom? Rogue agents and collateral assets get caught in the complicated crossfire while handshakes and quips about the contraband remain as simple as a briefcase full of money and looking the other way on the wink.

Game faces, questions asked but answers not given, and call outs on who would betray whom come to a head in Episode Five as The Night Manager's bait and switch suspicions put the viewer in on the game being played. Refugee camps cover the deals really happening – some aide given for the ironic photo op provides a heartbreaking realization on how much these millions could do if they were really done for good. Instead, crooks move into the vacuum created by a country's chaos with spectacular demonstrations of the fatal weaponry for sale. It's an impressive fireworks display, for war is a spectator's sport and napalm looks pretty at night. Though only eighteen months old, it's a bit creepy these days to watch this shrewd, timely update waxing on mercenaries, privatized warfare, false flags, and conveniently created coups. Risks and tensions rise while the on edge entourage points fingers at each other – warrants come and funding goes thanks to lies on the fly, deliberate power outages, and violence at home. The technicalities of the snare are well explained as interrogations escalate into your word versus mine silence. The luxury hotels and exotic veneer are less lush by the final hour as The Night Manager returns to the desert where this escapade began. Global enmity folds into government inquiries, potentially false intelligence, and mothballed agencies amid private vengeance and local drug lords hung out to dry. It's time for the millionaire transfer and final client exchange, but a cowboy and a pregnant woman are all that stand beside our ex-manager against the close calls, combinations to the safe, decoy parcels, and clues at the roulette table. Cover blowing confrontations have everyone looking over their shoulders as the lose ends are caught in the expensive, explosive just deserts.




Pine, Linden, Quince, Birch – executive producer Tom Hiddleston's (Kong: Skull Island) former soldier doesn't miss warfare but he doesn't know who he really is, either. Pine hibernates in the cold anonymity of hospitality, a relatable every man willfully hiding in a luxurious shadow with nothing but a backpack and a spartan room. He has a formal, controlled facade for every situation, but when he does stick his neck out against the morally wrong weapons trade and pass along information to his former military friends, the consequences isolate the newly cut to the core Pine even further. He uses that emotion to get Roper when he has the chance, gathering useful intel while keeping his cool on the fly and thinking fast with the right smile or wink. Up close signatures are different names but the same tell tale cursive, and the name tag uniform, leather jacket, and tailored suits match each persona as Pine plays spy in Roper's world – a lavish playground for his many sides to maneuver. “Linden's” happy he can summon a fake passport, “Quince” roughs people up to make it look really authentic, and “Birch” clearly enjoys everyone calling him handsome. A guy can get used to this deception, and the camera plays to Hiddleston's strengths – panning up as he struts across the screen and fills the whole canvas with his close shaves, shirtless muscles, steamy sheets, and piercing blue palette. Pine has a soft spot for count 'em three fallen women but ultimately ends up using them as well. He's the perfect front man with his debonair answers tricking people into speaking freely, unaware he is the dark horse topsy-turvying Roper's household. He gives bitter info about his father – it wouldn't be a Hiddleston role without daddy issues! – while playing chess with mentor Roper as he likewise puts the smolder on Jed. The cracking cat and mouse worsens as half alive Pine embraces the brutality of Roper's organization and has nothing left to lose when staring at the end of the gun barrel. The double crossing roles add to the life imitating art wink, and since he's again wearing his own wardrobe, Golden Globe winner Hiddleston can seem like he's just playing his blue steel self. While Loki requires a full transformative appearance, the performance in The Night Manager has merit enough to move Hiddleston beyond the Marvel wig. Ironically, he didn't need to try so hard with that summer tabloid fiasco said to have already cost him a chance at being the next James Bond. Could he be 007 in the same gritty vein as Daniel Craig? No. However, if the franchise returns to the lighthearted charm of the Roger Moore era, than yes. After all, Pine drinks martinis, too.

We hear tell of fellow EP and Globe winner Hugh Laurie's (House) charismatic “worst man in the world” Richard Roper before we meet him thanks to his rah rah videos – his photo ops say one thing and mean another, never mind that it isn't really farm equipment his shell companies are transporting behind the jolly good, what fun lifestyle. His dry wit and cool entourage stay at ease so long as one doesn't cross Dickie, but he will test or toy with people for his bemusement, talking to Pine as a paying custom to a subservient manager before taking to his English moxie. Roper pays the bills, so he gets to draw the map, and there's almost an admiration for his self-made if illegal hard work. He's calm when his son is threatened, expecting that what he says goes, yet Roper sentimentally repays Pine for his heroics, embracing him as someone not content with life who could be worthy of his operation. Roper can groom Pine in his own image, but warns him of what will happen if you don't follow daddy's rules. Dickie sees that the world is rotten and a truly free man embraces the cruelty to stay on top – a bleak but sadly not wrong notion. He doesn't lie, just merely says the right things until you don't notice the truth isn't one of them. Such shady work comes before Jed and his little Danny, but Roper can impart his tactics on the “young prince” Birch. While he's aware one shouldn't trust a man who has no appetite or vices and keeps some of his business mysteries from Andrew, he's almost impressed by one who might outwit him. Roper sips tea during some nonchalant bathtub torture, but mistakenly believes his own cheeky hype in this caper, calling his privatized warfare one big happy kingdom where he is Caesar sitting back as others do the violence for him. However, he dislikes being double crossed, and when Roper says it is borrowed time for anyone who betrays him, we believe it.


Olivia Colman's (Broadchurch) Angela Burr may be such a super role because the character was originally a man, but the pregnant actress makes it all the more juicy and numerous awards followed. Burr uses the personal against people with no qualms because she is in the right to do so, and she pushes Pine out of his element as both a maternal figure tapping into his duty and the devil on his shoulder playing his emotion over Roper. She likes that he is a clean slate she can muck up with a fake dossier and tests Pine with his father's past – casually saying she didn't know it meant that much to him, which he counters yes, she did. Angela jokes that being a pregnant woman is the perfect cover but as an Englishwoman balks at the idea of carrying a gun. She lays her plan to infiltrate Roper's circle on thick while insisting Pine eat a cookie, and Burr turns another asset by preying on his Catholicism with her pregnant woman guardian angel Madonna veneer. Only she can wash the blood from his hands with this deceptive womanly warmth, and though her condition adds to the tough travel, hot temperatures, and stakeout waiting; the entirety of the woman's existence is not her being with child. Huzzah! Angela admits to not really loving her decent, understanding husband and may have been a little naughty along the way it seems. Upon first viewing The Night Manager, her still unmistakably pregnant despite the timeline skips may be confusing, however we can forgive the film making trickery because she has to be fresh, pushy, and loud to get her way regardless thanks to nasty bureaucrats who don't want Burr digging further. She's always one step behind Roper, and this off the books operation is a risky venture that brings consequences close to home. Angela's scared, but she won't concede to an ignorant, stay a home life, giving the reason why she despises Roper in a stunning, heartfelt scene done with nothing but one woman retelling a terrible witness to another.

Perhaps Elizabeth Debicki (The Man from U.N.C.L.E) is an unconventional beauty to Hollywood standards, but she's a lady as tall as her men with an edgy haircut and sexy slip in or slip out effortless, elegant styles. Her Jed is initially blissfully unaware of Roper's ways – but she's not afraid to show her body to keep up the heated pools, lavish furs, and tubs of champagne. The subtle camera pans suggest what the men are thinking without being mere titillation to make the audience drool, and maybe it takes a woman director to know the difference. Jed has a family history that doesn't match the lingerie and satin robes brochure, and she won't let anyone see her tears, taking pills to cope and staying so cool on the outside as angry calls from home risk revealing her baggage to Roper. She's deluded herself into thinking this is a loving relationship rather than another one of Roper's arrangements, telling Pine knowing Roper's business would drive her mad and dropping dress to test him with her body because maybe that is the only way she knows how. However, Jed's doubts do blossom with Jonathan there to help her escape. She objects to being just another employee in Roper's shady deals, getting pissy and finding it more and more difficult to play along in keeping him happy. Jed becomes emotional – being in love makes her slip up, and she isn't as good at this covert fine line as the boys and her pretty face pays. Though at times the camera is too obvious in the lovebirds' stolen glances, that mirrors their increasing notice to others, and Tom Hollander's (Rev.) Lance “Corky” Corkoran sees Pine for exactly what he is. Initially, Corky's rare loyalty and ruthless skills are worth any bemusing faux pas. He enjoys getting under everyone's skin, flirting with Pine to gauge a response while remaining suave in his threats. Corky suggests big deals go down at family parties and seems unfettered by potential harm to the children, but he's rightfully suspicious of the employee from Switzerland with an international rap sheet posing as a chef in Mallorca who rescued the Chief's kid. His own vices, unfortunately, become an embarrassing liability – Roper can only overlook the $100 a pop “uncorking” expenses for so long until Corky's left home and pushed out of the business in favor of Birch. He warns him to back off romancing Jed and sobers up to confront Andrew. Unfortunately, there isn't room in Roper's court for both of them, and it is ridiculous that Hollander won the Supporting Actor Bafta yet received no other nominations.


The Night Manager has fine support all around, including David Harewood (Homeland) as Angela's likewise red taped American ally Joel Steadman. She needs him under the rug and on her side, and the implication of a past fling and his still having a soft spot for our hard dame is a wonderful touch contrasting the snobby smooth of Alistair Petri's (Rogue One) Lord Langbourne. He enjoys the viola in doing Roper's deals, liking Pine's suave front even if a simple hotel man raised up can't have the same elan as his aristocratic self. Sadly, Natasha Little (Another Life) as his wife Caroline is aware of the trade secrets and patting on the young nanny's bottom, gossiping to Pine because she wants to talk with someone else who sees everything. She dislikes him becoming Roper's “acolyte,” but Dickie humiliates her into reporting on Jed. Young Noah Jupe's (Suburbicon) Danny also factors into the plot as needed with Pine using Roper's son for information and connections – an unenviable situation for the only genuine and innocent person in this world who just likes having Jonathan as a friend. Aure Atika's (Mademoiselle Chambon) Sophie is also a bittersweet, trying to be brave, classy dame in with the wrong crowd both saved and ruined by the men around her. Frisky and Tabby bodyguards Michael Nardone (Rome) and Hovik Keuchkerian (Assassin's Creed) are sardonic but appropriately violent, while Douglas Hodge's Rex Mayhew (Penny Dreadful) is a good politician screwed over, and man, River House bad Tobias Menzies (Outlander) is once again so shady and smug, belittling Burr's agency as nothing more than her personal obsession with Roper, GTFO.

From Cairo and the Pyramids, Swiss resorts, or Mallorca palaces to British countrysides, London skylines, and Turkish hideaways; wherever The Night Manager roams there are sweet, sweet locales. Title cards giving time and place add to the assorted languages as sweeping overhead shots and wide lenses make people small against the scene setting grandeur – be it Spanish churches symbolizing guilt and repentance or snowy mountaintops touching the humbling night sky. Click click snapshots match spying camera views of SUV entourages while up close photography draws the viewer into the heist action. While the steeped in the plot technology will be dated soon, such security scanning, encrypted messages, retina recognition, and voice transfers are high tech enough to be slightly fantastic yet believably slick. So what if sliding tablet screens and thumbs poised over the green send call button aren't the slammed receiver from the days of old – criminal satellite visuals and night vision screens contrast the less tricked out official outfits using fax machines, older televisions, and big computers. Interiors are likewise warmed with fire lit glows or sunny island windows for the lavish compared to frigid government offices. The brief nudity is sexy but demure, however brief ghostly flashes are unnecessary thanks to better editing and photography already reflecting internal character angst. Pine also smokes in one scene purely to show his willpower against Roper, but it is such a fine mano y mano moment we can allow it. The Night Manager is shot like a film, and while some viewers may find the stylish transitions irrelevant, it's nice to have a series setting itself apart with visual flair looking more expensive than it actually is. The haunting melodies and simmering music fit this beautiful but dangerous edge, and the excellent opening credits sum up the series perfectly with a mirage of bombs, firepower, and explosive clouds merging with alluring diamonds, champagne, and crashing chandeliers.


Although the stateside AMC airing of The Night Manager made slight editing and censoring changes – international screenings also changed the series from six solid hours to eight, forty-five minute episodes for some markets – there are behind the scenes features and bonuses available amid several uncut video releases and streaming options. In contrast to that other MI-6 agent, The Night Manager combines the individual spy, larger mission, team at hand, and female characters better than Spectre without sacrificing any extravagance. I still say Spectre's formula of MI-6 getting the job done largely without Bond can be a 008 Netflix series in between movies, but The Night Manager works as both one cinematic binge or an episodic pace. It's great on the first viewing for all the surprises, but the allure grows the more times you watch all the slight of hand, drool worthy people, and pretty places. Though not a totally faithful adaptation for novel purists, the miniseries ends well with awards acclaim and continued success necessitating rumblings of a follow up season. I'd love to see more, but a sequel has to be as good as this debut, and The Night Manager is difficult act to follow. Rather than weekly flash a minute, for the cool fake outs, The Night Manager updates Le Carre's espionage into a contemporary, relevant, and well balanced but no less enticing potboiler.